What's That, You Say?

Injury report day for the Steelers.

Here's the diagnosis...

Troy's got a strained calf, but it should not limit him on Sunday.

Justin Hartwig, who the Post-Gazette referred to as Jeff Hartwig, which embarrassingly marked the first time I actually made the connection between his name and Jeff Hartings' name, also injured his knee, but it too should not limit him Sunday.


Still, grrrr...a little...

Looks like Tomlin agrees.

Take A Breather, James...

Silverback questionable for Sunday?

Survey says...SIT HIS ASS!

That's the last thing we need is our team MVP to exacerbate an injury in order to beat the 4-11 Browns, with Gradkowski at the helm, no less.

As Spike Lee once "said" - Do the right thing, Tomlin.

Goodnight, Sweet Prince...

Marvel Smith to IR.

Could this spell the end of ol' Marvel in Pittsburgh?

Who knows, but it spells the end of his '08-'09 season.

Either way, get yourself healthy, Marvel. Steeler or not, we wish you all the best health-wise. And don't believe Santonio when he tells you he's got the answer. Weed only works on cataracts.

Still Wondering About Marvel Smith's Life?

Alright, so Marvel Smith hasn't played since October 5 at Jagoffville, and we've heard that he may need back surgery again this offseason.

So ummm, at what point do we just put him on IR?

I mean, I love the guy. When he's healthy, I'd prefer him over Max Starks every day of the week. But it doesn't appear that he's in very good shape, as he'll be missing his 8th straight game this coming Sunday.

What are we holding out for, January? I doubt we want a Left Tackle with a bad back protecting our franchise arm in the playoffs. But, then again, I could be wrong.

Reactions?

PS - I emailed this one to Random Asshole last night, so he's already seen it. Duder, you can ignore this, or just leave your reply in the comments. Your choice.

News You Might Care About...

The Steelers just re-signed Najeh Davenport.

I guess Willie's vag may be hurt more than he's letting on...

Awesome...

Not.

Jusssstttt Try And Relax...

Hey guys, guess what today is? That's right! Injury report day!

From time to time I like to masochisticly celebrate this much anticipated day of the week...and today's one of those times.

So, while it won't be fun, and it may not be entertaining, I'm going to attempt to handicap the odds of five particular Steelers taking the field for Sunday's Hatriot hunt.

KEISEL THE DIESEL

10 to 1. In fact, 2 to 1 he doesn't play for a month. Seriously? Man, that sucks! What are you smiling about, dude? Go get your shit a massage or something, for Christ's sake!

MASTER FLY W. LARGE

3 to 1. Unless he has some freak lawn darts accident tomorrow, all signs point to him playing. My sources tell me his vagina's healing real nicely.

SANSMOKIO THE BEAR

Without Weed - 1 to 1
With Weed - 6 to 1
The only way 'Tone doesn't play in this one is if he forgets he has a game on Sunday afternoon. In that case, we'll probably find him at Taco Bell.

BRYANT MCSICKGOATEE

I'm gonna go 5 to 1, here. If he harnesses the power of that chiseled-ass goat, we're good. If not, we'll have to see. Man, I wish I could grow facial hair. Maybe when I'm 30.

And last but certainly not least...

STEELY MCBEAM

1 to 1. God would never allow me the satisfaction...after all, I'm in law school.

So, how do you guys feel about all of this? Which of these injuries is potentially the worst (besides my bruised brain)? And has anyone had a nightmare involving that Steely McDevil photoshop yet?

...'cause that'd be awesome...

Secured!

Not pictured: Snipers Silverback and The Wood.

As they say, a win is a win.

Things that were awesome...
1. Silverback and LaMarr Woodley combining for four of five total sacks
2. Santonio's catch and run on the play that sparked all our momentum
3. Jeff Reed
4. Mewelde Moore and Carey Davis stepping up
5. Winning and being 1st in the division with a leg up on Bawlmore and Cleveland

Things that were not awesome...
1. Joe Flacco marching the Ratbirds down the field to tie it up
2. Multiple false start penalties on same drive
3. Mitch Berger's stat line - Average Punt = 40 yards
4. Listening to Jaws whisper sweet nothings about Joe Flacco all night
5. The game ending at 12:15 or some such ungodly hour for a blogger with a real job

Things that sucked...
1. The 1st half
2. Big Ben IN the 1st half
3. Bruce Arians' PLAY CALLING in the 1st half
4. Mendenhall and Simmons to IR?
5. Ray Lewis comparing himself to Michael Strahan

"Full" game recap post may follow later this morning. Until then...what say you, Steeler brethren?

Oh, and while I'm getting my act together, witness the celebratory idiocy...

Ever since I was a lower case c
But now I'm a big C
The girls see I got the money
$100 $5 bills y'all...