Yes, I went with the obvious joke. So sue me.
31-0. As it should have been.
But at what cost?
Sure, it's only a concussion. But of all things you thought could happen yesterday, was that one?
I'm not going to lie, if it wasn't for the defensive plays yesterday, Ben going down like that would've pretty much ruined the game for me. And tell me you weren't wondering why Hines etc. were still in during the 4th quarter when we were already well in control of that game.
Anyways, not much really to say. The Browns looked like a Mickey Mouse league team out there. And a shitty one at that. Starting a 4th string QB who'd spent a whole two weeks with the team. Running Cribbs and Harrison out of the wildcat. Eek.
Too bad the Lions didn't get to play the Browns this season, or maybe they wouldn't have gone winless.
Probably wouldn't have prevented Phil Savage and Romeo Crennel from getting fired, though.
So I could go on about things that are of very little consequence. But I won't.
Instead, here are the "Things That Were Awesome," "Things That Were Not Awesome," and "Things That Made Me Switch to Hard Liquor"...
THINGS THAT WERE AWESOME
1. Tyrone Carter - 3 solo tackles, 2 picks, 1 TD and a partridge in a pear tree
You better call Ty-rone!
2. Hines Ward - 6 catches for 70 yds, making it 1043 yds for the season!
3. The Law - Involved in 8 tackles!
4. Nice to see Master Fly W. Large finally get in the end zone...
5. Anthony Smith didn't do anything dumb!
THINGS THAT WERE NOT AWESOME
1. Sitting by myself at the bar. At least I coerced the waitress into letting me sit in the back room where I could have a whole TV to myself. Still had to listen to Giants fans bellow, though...
"Yeah, WOOOOOO, that's what I'm talking about, bro! Yo bro, Did you see Ward on that run? Aw bro, it was sick like my blowout haircut! Hair gel in the hoooouuuussseee! Chest bump! After this, let's celebrate and go tanning!"...my apologies in advance to all of my sensible Giants fan friends, who are all relatively decent human beings...
2. The fact that we had to challenge this...
3. Willie Colon's holding penalty, negating Nate Washington's 41 yd TD play.
4. Gradkowski's QB rating...1
5. Another one of these...
THINGS THAT MADE ME SWITCH TO HARD LIQUOR
1. This...
2. This...
3. This...
4. This...
5. This...
We've now got two weeks off. A few beers. A few laughs. Our troubles are over. Let's hope Big Ben drinks his milk.
It's either the Colts or the Chargers on January 11th. And given our last games with these clowns, methinks we better be ready to throw down. One and done is for the Cowboys. This team is headed for the AFC Championship game...I hope.
Here's your Week 17 flipbook...
Say Mike, you need a Defensive Coach?
Yeah, where was your life?
I once went on a date with a chick who had those earrings. Not even making that up.
Dead man walking.
What's up buttercup?...
I like your smile...
Hey, how'd this picture of my girlfriend get in here? Ooops!
Still holdin' that clipboard like nobody's business, jacked up hand and all...
I've got my eye on you, ref.
That'll do, Dan. That'll do...
Joke of the Day = You know how you know you're going to lose in fantasy?
When your opponent's DEFENSE puts up 33 pts to lead his team in scoring. Hey Eagles Defense, drown yourselves. I hate you. But congratulations to Pat from WHYGAVS! As you can see, I didn't even have a winning record during the regular season. So this happening was about as inevitable as Clay Aiken admitting his gayness.
Random Question of the Day = Cris Colinsworth thinks Carolina's headed to the Super Bowl...
You buyin' that?
The Pulse of Eagles Nation = 10 bucks says Silky Johnson was partying last night like it was 2004.
I can only hope there was no roof access. Congrats on playoffs, jagoff!
Ok, last thing...I promise. Check out this guy's sweet moves...
Do Chargers fans know how to party or what?
You know the drill. Lay your assessments on me!
