Meeting People Is Easy...

So, every week I do this whole intro thing, in which I say a bunch of stuff that doesn't matter. And really it's mostly just filler.

I mean, if there are new panelists, it makes sense to introduce them, because, you know, maybe you're not as familiar with their work as you are with that of the MPIE regulars. But when it's just the All-Star cast, I think that work's already been done several times over.

Anyways, as you will see, this week's panel is...
1. Neena
2. Tiny350z
3. Marc
4. Vern
5. Lori
6. John Woods
7. Grumpy
8. Steve
9. Ladi Izz
10. laclips
11. Doug
12. Nate
13. Matt
14. Sean
15. Noah
16. Hey, what's up?

Once it gets up over like 14, I feel like I should split it into two different photoshops. But when I was doing this at 1AM last night, I didn't quite have the good judgment or the foresight to realize that. Actually, I didn't even realize until just now that there were 16 people on this week's panel.

Clearly I'm well aware of life...

In any case, I've written my filler, introduced the panel, and made jokes at my own expense, which means now you should just read the actual questions and answers.

I dare you to salvage more than 10% of your brain cells by the time you're done.

Oh yeah, and Lori sent me this video that goes with her Favorite Song of the Moment...


And...GO!

Click to enlarge...

Now, just for the hell of it, since I got my hands on some pictures from the Steelers workouts...


Ziggy Hood is all business.


"You see, Bruce. That's how you take down a motherf*#@er."


As usual, Jeff Reed took this shit real seriously...where did he even find a construction helmet? ...let's hope in Ben's locker. HEYO!


Pictures of everybody wearing helmets except Ben.

And finally...

GO PENS!!

See you at Foley's for Game 7!

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Meeting People Is Easy...

The wait is over
The photoshop is done
I'm somewhat exhausted
But the battle's been won

Ok, you know you something's really gone awry when you start writing bad poetry to introduce Meeting People Is Easy.

Shameful.

That'll teach me NOT to write down the first thing that pops into my head.

Anyways, after a somewhat extended respite, the great MPIE has made a triumphant return. And with it, comes several new panelists with whom you may or may not already be familiar.

They are (in order of appearance)...

1. DrinkYourMilkshake ~ The man responsible for Behind The Steel Curtain's Daily Six Pack, the brain trust behind yesterday's emotionally disturbing photoshop of AQ Shipley and Kraig Urbik spooning, and an all around exemplary individual. Oh yeah, and I heard he did a mean rendition of Beastie Boys at karaoke last night. Send video if you have it. Follow this crazy asshole on Twitter, here.

2. laclips ~ The illustrious editor of This Is Getting Old, a big time Pens, Pirates and Penn State fan, and a fellow music lover. Anyone who has the foresight to use the Pearl Jam dude as their avatar is +1 in my book. Follow this pinball wizard on Twitter, here.

3. Kristin ~ The editor of KB Toys With..., a rabid Eagles fan, and yet, miraculously, also my girlfriend. She may have an unhealthy obsession with Brian Westbrook, but I take solace in the fact that I'm a solid eight inches taller than that joke (ok, like four...but who's counting?). And hey, at least she's not a Ravens fan. Plus, she's insanely cute and consistently makes me laugh. So I'm willing to overlook her misguided fandom...Follow the yin to my yang on Twitter, here.

In addition to our MPIE rooks, you'll also read comedic stylings from the likes of...

The inimitable - John Woods
My go-to political commentator - Grumpy
The Octomom's #1 hater - Tiny350Z
My brother in the bonds of old school Metallica love - Steve
The soon to be half marathon king - Marc
You may also know him as Maticulous - Matt
Possibly MPIE's greatest supporter (or perhaps apologist) - Noah
Apparently he's kind of a big deal in Taiwan - Sean
I think he might be a Pens fan but I can't be sure - Tecmo
And, of course, my dumb ass

So, I believe all that's left is for you to read this week's panel's answers to this week's burning questions.

Which I urge you to do...now.

And enjoy!

Click to enlarge...

I have to admit, I can't really count this post among my better work...

Whatever, wake me up when it's time for happy hour...I'll meet you all at the bar.

Oh yeah, and this stays...

GO PENS!

Obligatory Footer - If you haven't already, become a fan of OFTOT on Facebook, join the blog network and follow me on Twitter. Or don't. Your choice, really.

Meeting People Is Easy...

There comes a point in the evening/early morning after which no one can be expected to be funny. Last night, that point came shortly after 1 AM, when I was just about finished with all the dirty work, but hadn't added my answers to the MPIE grid yet.

Conversely, there is also a point in the morning before which no one can be expected to be funny. And today we still haven't reached that point yet.

Plus, all photoshop and no play makes Cotter wanna cut himself...

So I guess the net message = If it's mildly humorous, witty prose you want right now, might I suggest you start a blog and write some of your own.

'Cause I got nothing.

Anyways, here's this week's panel...

1. Dan Gigler
2. tiny350z
3. Marc
4. Vern
5. Don
6. Joey Porter's Pit Bulls
7. Notgomu
8. Sean
9. Noah
10. Ben
11. Doug
12. Tecmo
13. Nate
14. El Jefe

You know what to do...

Click to enlarge...

Now, where the hell is my coffee?

Obligatory Footer - If you haven't already, become a fan of OFTOT on Facebook, join the blog network and follow me on Twitter. Or don't. Your choice, really.

Vote for OFTOT!

Alright, rarely do I write dedicated self-serving posts like this, but I'm making an exception this morning.

Today marks the beginning of Sean's Rambling's "Best Pittsburgh Sports Blog Tournament." Now, what does this really mean? Who knows.

It's kind of like the time in college when I was in A Chi O's Man of the Year competition. I blew away the competition with my shredding guitar skills, and yet, still lost because voting was based on people buying tickets to vote. My friends, the ones who stuck around after I played, were not about to be spending their disposable income on voting for my ass. Come on, now. There were bars to hit later that night. So I lost, despite that everyone told me I should've won. Whatever. I still got a free t-shirt out of it.

Oh yeah, the guy who won re-enacted Justin Timberlake's "Like I Love You" video. I find solace in the fact that if that's what it took to win, I'd rather just not.

Anyways, this thing isn't too serious, but I might as well urge y'all to go vote for me over at Sean's place. Maybe if you're lucky and I win, I'll send you some Smiley cookies or something.

You'll have to excuse me. It's still too early for me to be funny...

Where Are You Watching The Game On Sunday?

As promised, here's installment #2 of this garbage I'm calling a feature, "Where are YOU Watching The Super Bowl?" I'd provide some sort of witty/insightful/sarcastic commentary, but frankly, I'm bushed.

Anyways, here's where our following friends are watching the game this Sunday...

Ladi Izz
I'm just watching it at home. The only tradition I have is that I make chili every year for the Super Bowl.

Doug
I will be watching the game at home again this year. Except this year we plan on having some people over to watch the game. This will be a first in our household. Beer, food, and football on HD is the only way to go. Plus I can get loaded during the game, which I plan on doing, and not have to worry about driving. Even though I hate watching the game with anyone, I will let that go for the Super Bowl.

Sean (of Sean's Ramblings fame)
When the playoffs began three years ago, we agreed to host a Super Bowl party for a group of friends. The Steelers were the #6 seed and seemed to have little chance of reaching the Super Bowl especially since the Indianapolis Colts dominated the league during the regular season.  About a month later, the Steelers defeated the Broncos and were headed to Detroit. Since we had already agreed to host a party, we didn't want to break our plans. We had 3 or 4 other couples at our home, and I was the only person who truly followed the Steelers. There were a couple people with Pittsburgh ties who rooted for the Steelers to win and a few others that wanted the Steelers to win because they wanted me to be in a good mood. However, there was one person at the party who was a Redskins fan. He openly supported the Seahawks because he felt that Seattle winning would look better for the Redskins, who lost to the Seahawks earlier in the playoffs. I still don't understand the logic behind this. I should note that although I did not kick him out of my home during the game, we are not friends anymore. I'm not sure if I've even talked to him since that night.
 
So now that the Steelers are back in the Super Bowl, I've had a bit of a dilemma about where to watch the game this year. I thought about going back to Pittsburgh but I really can't take off time from work since I have a big conference coming up and just took the hockey road trip vacation. We could host again but I don't want to deal with making sure everyone has enough food and drink while trying to watch the game. So instead, we are going over to our friends' house. There will be about 10 people there, and although no else is really a Steelers fan, they are all football fans. They understand the importance the Steelers have in my life, and the hosts have already assured me that no one will be rooting for the Cardinals. While ideally I'd like to watch the game with only Steelers fans, I'm going to watch the game with close friends which is all anyone can ask for.
 
Plus, I'm sure I'll be on the phone with my dad and brother throughout the game.

Ben
I will be the host of a Super Bowl party right here in Indianapolis for my friends that live here. Festivities will start around 1 or 2 with the grill and some beers. Then we'll have some beers and watch the 2 previous playoff games (I have them saved on DVR). Then we'll have some beers with another round of grilling. During the game there will be beers and some snacks, finger foods, etc..... Then the postgame there will be even more beers and either a bunch of shit talking by me or the consoling of me by my friends. Nonetheless there will be beers! GO STEELERS!!!!!!

Pat (WHYGAVS)
I will be watching the game either in Chapel Hill or Pittsburgh, depending on if I get enough work done this week to disappear for three days and not feel bad about it.

This week is going to break me. And so is MPIE...consequently, I may have to switch that and this for tomorrow. We shall see. Anwyays, this happened.

/done

Meeting People Is Easy...

Best thing about that Penn State-USC Rose Bowl yesterday? The Blue Band's Queen medley of Bohemian Rhapsody, Bicycle Race, and probably some other awesome tunes that I didn't get to hear because ABC went to commercial. Otherwise, I'll be forgetting the rest of that abomination by the end of the day. Screw you, Pac-10.

Anyways, welcome to 2009!

New Year, New Panel.

In no particular order, accompanied by audio of their "most played song" of 2008, they are...

1. Ladi Izz ~

2. Vern ~ Here you go...click on OMG

3. Sean ~

4. Shawn K ~

5. Lori ~ I cannot be relied upon to pick one of these. Choose your own adventure. Unless Lori has recommendations?

6. Doug ~

7. Noah ~ I don't wanna pick the wrong version here either. But you can check it out, here.

8. Don ~

9. Marc ~

10. The Immortal Silky Johnson ~
PS - had to go with a live version because Universal is super douchey and won't let me embed any of their artists' music. Weak. Also, Silky, your resolution is unrealistic. But I applaud the effort.

11. My Dad ~ YouTube has no answer for this one. I guess y'all will just have to download it to check it out...

12. Me ...
#1 =
#2 =
[I recommend not listening to #2 at work, or if you have any dangerous objects nearby, or around small children...and not because of the lyrics]

As always, click to enlarge...

And if you haven't perused OFTOT's Top Photoshops of 2008, I strongly urge you to check that shit out this morning.

I'm at work.

Send sedatives. Or Xanax. Either one works.

Meeting People Steelers Gifts Is Easy...

Alright, now that I write that headline, it doesn't make a ton of sense. In fact, it may not be anything close to proper Enlgish. But frankly my dears, I don't give a damn...[you know how this ends].

Anyways, the idea is that I emailed out a bunch of names of Steelers players to the usual MPIE suspects and asked them what they would get each of those Steelers players for Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa, whatever their little hearts desired.

So with that in mind, here is your panel...

1. John Woods
2. Ben
3. Marc
4. Don
5. Doug
6. Notgomu
7. Nate
8. The Chief
9. Shawn K
10. Sean
11. Me

You'll notice that I've got two sets of players here below. That's because, just in case, by some festivus miracle, I got an overwhelming response, I could do two grids. But, as you and I both might have expected, that didn't happen. So I just combined the answers into one grid. Hence, John Woods through Nate all answered the first list (Big Ben, Willie Parker, etc.) and The Chief through Me all answered the second list (Hines Ward, Santonio, etc.).

I trust y'all can follow all that...

Click below to enlarge...

And with that, I'd like to wish y'all a happy holiday, whichever one you celebrate! May you get everything you want this year. And I can only hope that visions of Sugar Plums dance in your head and not visions of Steely McDevil...

What? You think I'd let this opportunity pass without using that image? Come on. Be serious!

Happy Thanksgiving, You Turkeys!

Well, here we are - just a mere 10 hours away from the day of the year on which we're all to give thanks for the things we value the most. And since for many of us, one of those things is the Steelers, I thought it'd be fun to ask some of my Steelers-loving blogger brethren to give a little thanks of their own in advance. So I asked as many of these friends as I could if they'd be interested in expressing one thing they're happy for in relation to the Steelers this year. And luckily, many of them were gracious enough to do so. You'll find all their answers below.

Before we get to that, I'd just like to thank everyone for doing this. I know, as the editor of a blog I often struggle to keep up with, that blogging on your own site is enough without someone else asking for your help on their blog. So I'm very grateful that all of these OFTOT friends took the time out to give thanks in anticipation of tomorrow's graciousness.

Without further ado, I give you, the Steelers blogosphere's Thanksgiving thanks...feel free to give us your own in the comments!

DON, Mondesi's House ~ If this year has taught me to be thankful for anything, it's to be thankful for Daniel Sepulveda.

THE CHIEF, The Chief's Forum ~ I'm thankful for Mike Tomlin actually showing some emotion on the sidelines this year instead of "The World's Most Understanding Coach" which is what he resembled last season. I've no idea how much that plays into the performance of the team but after 15 years of Cowher, you can't quit cold turkey (get it!?!?!)

VERN, You Lay On The Ice Like A Broad ~ I'm Steelers-y thankful for a few things. First, I'm thankful that although he's absorbed a pounding that would make the chick from the Houston 500 Gangbang cringe, Benjamin H. Roethlisberger is still able to walk upright and throw footballs with enough velocity for the receivers to drop them. H. is probably not his middle initial.

I'm thankful that although they've played like absolute garbage offensively for long stretches of time, they are still 8-3 and reside in a division that contains the likes of the Bengals and Browns. I'm also thankful that James Harrison focuses his energy towards football and not systematic mass murders.

I'm thankful that Ray Lewis is in the division, but not on the team that I cheer for. Ray Lewis is such an easy target, just like the two people he stabbed to death a couple years ago. But having to root for Ray Lewis would be the equivalent of being forced to cheer for the Trail of Tears. We are all lucky that we don't have to wish for this douchebag to do good things for our team, which would probably kill all of the enjoyment we'd be getting from the game to begin with. And remember, Ray, just because you broke Rashard Mendenhall's shoulder with a good hit doesn't mean that your team won the game and you didn't kill two people and get away with it.

I'm thankful that as of right now, I do not fear the (almost) annual Bill Cowher playoff collapse.

I'm thankful that I never got stopped in a park by Kordell Stewart.

And last but not least, I'm thankful that the Steelers are going to be given the chance to go into Gillette and shave Bill Belichick's balls. I'm just assuming that's Gillette slang for blowing somebody out. It's gotta be. I'll take on any arguments to the contrary.

Happy Thanksgiving, all! Let's celebrate this day the way the Pilgrims did and not give the indians smallpox blankets for a day. And it's finally nice out in Florida, so enjoy your snow while I'm out poolside spitting weak game at chicks so out of my league that I feel like an Arena League team.

TECMO, Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies ~ I'm thankful that Anthony Smith hasn't opened his mou...

...that Brett Keisel hasn't been injur...

...that Ben hasn't thrown a bunch of intercepti...

...that Rashard has contribut...

...that Dennis Dixon has been on the field to confus...

...that Arians hasn't looked incompet...

...uh...that we're 8-3 through 2/3 of the "toughest schedule in 25 years."

Yeah...that one.

SEAN, Sean's Ramblings ~ I am thankful that no Steeler took naked photos of himself of this year (at least I think it wasn't this year). On a more serious note, I am thankful that the Steelers resigned James Farrior this year. While Harrison, Woodley, Aaron Smith and Troy get all the headlines, there is not a more solid and consistent person to lead the defense than Farrior.

NEAL COOLONG, Behind The Steel Curtain ~ I'm thankful for the fortune of being able to watch the NFL's best athlete, Troy Polamalu, each game. He does things on a game-per-game basis that makes me renew my loyalty to the NFL as my only source of pure entertainment. I'm thankful for the fact we get to see a once-in-a-generation player on our team.

SHEENA BEASTON, Sheena Beaston ~ I give thanks for Jimmy Harry's sweet behind and his incredible ability to leap, even when not necessary.

And me? I'm just thankful that Tommy Maddox is safe and sound, far far away from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania!

Have a Happy Thanksgiving, jagoffs! Have a beer and stuff yourself silly for me! I'll see y'all on Friday(?) And please, no one make the joke about sticking your dick in the mashed potatoes. This is NOT that kind of party...

Cheers!

Meeting People Is Easy...

Attention, good people of the blogosphere - an egregious violation has been committed.

The window on Domski's car that has the Steelers decal was spray painted on yesterday evening.

Listen, violators of Domski's Hyundai Elantra, you will not get away with this. We will track you down and spray paint dicks on your face. In fact, we'll take turns outlining our own dicks on your face with spray paint. This aggression will not stand. This aggression will not stand, man.

And now that we've got that out of the way, let's meet our esteemed panel for this week...

1. Chimpanzee Rage ~ Dude, this is pretty badass shit. Good thing HE'S wearing a helmet.

2. Harvey Bars ~ I mean, I just don't...I...uh, wow...yeah...

3. Cecilio's Scribe ~ Yeah, my question is - like at what point do we just stop trusting ESPN for shit?

4. Mike Frazer ~ Failure to be part of the Offense, annnnd...failure to be part of the Offense, annnnd...smoking the reefer!

5. THE Jim ~ Jesus.

6. Sean ~ I'll put you in touch with Domski. He and I have a full lexicon of Spanish swear words. Thank you, Houlihan's Christiana.

7. Keith ~ If only this blog had such a button...

8. Noah ~ I fully appreciate his continued support of Killswitch Engage.

9. Christy ~ Still met Troy Polamalu and we did not.

10. Tecmo ~ In his words, "worlds collide."

11. Me ~ When will the reign of terror end?

As usual, click to enlarge...

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go watch highlights of Alan Faneca from last night and cry. Tissues, please.

Meeting People Is Easy...

It's been a long week. Last Saturday morning I woke up feeling like I'd just died, and I hadn't even drank the night before. Oh no, this wasn't hangover sick. This was like, my head feels like it's about to explode and my body is being taken over by mucus sick. And I'm still not fully recovered. Plus, you know, I have a real job that requires my attention. Sometimes.

Anyways, shitty week or not, I wasn't going to let Meeting People Is Easy slip. A man's gotta have priorities, right? Unfortunately for me, MPIE represents one of the higher ones. Right up there with school and eating Pepperidge Farm Orange Milano cookies.

This week it's an all Steelers fan/blogger cast. The panel consisting of...

Christmas Ape ~ Poised to destroy me in fantasy this Sunday...hard.

The Immortal Silky Johnson ~ Recently victimized by his company's e-Censorship policy...

Tobiathan ~ Has already commented on this post in his mind...

Don ~ Man, it's been too long since we've had Don on the panel...

Random Asshole ~ Yes, the worst part about living in Boston would definitely be all the Patriot "fans..."

Jup ~ Headed to the 'Burgh for the next week...if you see him, say hello...

Sean ~ See, I'm of the mindset that you can't really know someone UNTIL you've seen them in their pajamas at the grocery store...

Nate ~ Social commentator...

THE Jim ~ This is exactly the type of attorney I'd like to become...

Domski ~ Living among some of the country's best and brightest...

Me ~ Come pick me up...take me out...well, you know this one, don't you?

As usual, click to enlarge...


Man, I'm going to bed. Catch you all on the internets.

Meeting People Is Easy...

Well first of all, thank friggin' God it's Friday.

Perhaps you've noticed my glaring absence from OFTOT this week. At least in the comments. This is not entirely intentional. See, unbeknownst to you all, I've been out of my mind with some bullshit at work/school this week. You know, Powerpoints and the like. Really fun stuff like that. So you'll notice that today's MPIE is relatively mini-horse-like in comparison to recent weeks. I only hope you can all forgive me for that.

Now to introduce our "expert" panel...

1. Silky Johnson ~ Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta go put some water in Mama McNabb's dish...

2. Neal Coolong ~ James Harrison = way > Ray Lewis...decipher that one.

3. LJKC ~ Did she seriously let Matt use a keyboard to deface her otherwise excellent blog? [Just kidding, Matt]

4. Big Snack Silverback ~ We seriously went back and forth for a good 10 minutes trading lyrics from "Fight The Power"...I really felt we shared a moment...

5. Pat ~ Recently "wrapped" another season of Pirates baseball...I don't know how you do it, dude...That's what I call dedicaton.

6. Sean ~ My new Facebook friend...like I told Sean - if you're not friends on the internets, you are not friends at all.

7. Tecmo ~ I don't know why I continue to put a black bar over his eyes. It's not like you guys have never seen his mug before...

8. Me ~ Caffeine is a hell of a drug.

As usual, you know the drill - Click to enlarge...


Can't make any guarantees on an afternoon post today. I'm going to make my best effort. But I've got a pretty long day fitting of the pretty long WEEK I've had. My apologies for the lack of quality around here this week. Shit's rough nowadays.

See you all on the internets...

/Needs some God damned sleep