Meeting People Is Easy...

So, every week I do this whole intro thing, in which I say a bunch of stuff that doesn't matter. And really it's mostly just filler.

I mean, if there are new panelists, it makes sense to introduce them, because, you know, maybe you're not as familiar with their work as you are with that of the MPIE regulars. But when it's just the All-Star cast, I think that work's already been done several times over.

Anyways, as you will see, this week's panel is...
1. Neena
2. Tiny350z
3. Marc
4. Vern
5. Lori
6. John Woods
7. Grumpy
8. Steve
9. Ladi Izz
10. laclips
11. Doug
12. Nate
13. Matt
14. Sean
15. Noah
16. Hey, what's up?

Once it gets up over like 14, I feel like I should split it into two different photoshops. But when I was doing this at 1AM last night, I didn't quite have the good judgment or the foresight to realize that. Actually, I didn't even realize until just now that there were 16 people on this week's panel.

Clearly I'm well aware of life...

In any case, I've written my filler, introduced the panel, and made jokes at my own expense, which means now you should just read the actual questions and answers.

I dare you to salvage more than 10% of your brain cells by the time you're done.

Oh yeah, and Lori sent me this video that goes with her Favorite Song of the Moment...


And...GO!

Click to enlarge...

Now, just for the hell of it, since I got my hands on some pictures from the Steelers workouts...


Ziggy Hood is all business.


"You see, Bruce. That's how you take down a motherf*#@er."


As usual, Jeff Reed took this shit real seriously...where did he even find a construction helmet? ...let's hope in Ben's locker. HEYO!


Pictures of everybody wearing helmets except Ben.

And finally...

GO PENS!!

See you at Foley's for Game 7!

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Meeting People Is Easy...

The wait is over
The photoshop is done
I'm somewhat exhausted
But the battle's been won

Ok, you know you something's really gone awry when you start writing bad poetry to introduce Meeting People Is Easy.

Shameful.

That'll teach me NOT to write down the first thing that pops into my head.

Anyways, after a somewhat extended respite, the great MPIE has made a triumphant return. And with it, comes several new panelists with whom you may or may not already be familiar.

They are (in order of appearance)...

1. DrinkYourMilkshake ~ The man responsible for Behind The Steel Curtain's Daily Six Pack, the brain trust behind yesterday's emotionally disturbing photoshop of AQ Shipley and Kraig Urbik spooning, and an all around exemplary individual. Oh yeah, and I heard he did a mean rendition of Beastie Boys at karaoke last night. Send video if you have it. Follow this crazy asshole on Twitter, here.

2. laclips ~ The illustrious editor of This Is Getting Old, a big time Pens, Pirates and Penn State fan, and a fellow music lover. Anyone who has the foresight to use the Pearl Jam dude as their avatar is +1 in my book. Follow this pinball wizard on Twitter, here.

3. Kristin ~ The editor of KB Toys With..., a rabid Eagles fan, and yet, miraculously, also my girlfriend. She may have an unhealthy obsession with Brian Westbrook, but I take solace in the fact that I'm a solid eight inches taller than that joke (ok, like four...but who's counting?). And hey, at least she's not a Ravens fan. Plus, she's insanely cute and consistently makes me laugh. So I'm willing to overlook her misguided fandom...Follow the yin to my yang on Twitter, here.

In addition to our MPIE rooks, you'll also read comedic stylings from the likes of...

The inimitable - John Woods
My go-to political commentator - Grumpy
The Octomom's #1 hater - Tiny350Z
My brother in the bonds of old school Metallica love - Steve
The soon to be half marathon king - Marc
You may also know him as Maticulous - Matt
Possibly MPIE's greatest supporter (or perhaps apologist) - Noah
Apparently he's kind of a big deal in Taiwan - Sean
I think he might be a Pens fan but I can't be sure - Tecmo
And, of course, my dumb ass

So, I believe all that's left is for you to read this week's panel's answers to this week's burning questions.

Which I urge you to do...now.

And enjoy!

Click to enlarge...

I have to admit, I can't really count this post among my better work...

Whatever, wake me up when it's time for happy hour...I'll meet you all at the bar.

Oh yeah, and this stays...

GO PENS!

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Meeting People Is Easy...

# of panelists = 17
Size of MPIE photoshop file = 36 MB
Hours spent photoshopping = Eat me
Reading this week's responses = PRICELESS

My Mom always told me, if you're going to do something, don't half ass it. I really took that to heart. And since I apply the same rules to blogging as I do to life, you'll see I've really dedicated myself to providing a fine MPIE this week.

17 panelists isn't a record, but it's pretty close. In hindsight, I probably should've broken this into two different images. But then again, in hindsight I am also lazy.

This week we've got many familiar faces and one noob. This week's rookie is KT, aka KDudders. What can I really say about Katie that her avatar doesn't already say for itself? If that thing is any indication of what she's like in real life, suffice it to say Katie doesn't eff around.

Joining her this week, the rest of your panel looks like this...

1. John Woods ~ High up on the ballot for the MPIE Hall of Fame...

2. Tiny350z ~ Sleeps with a cat as a blanket...

3. Pat ~ If the Pirates keep this up, methinks he may explode with excitement. Either way, don't sweat Doumit's injury too much...

4. Vern ~ Don Banks = drama queen...

5. Brett ~ Has semi-recently branched out to Twitterwebs...

6. Joey Porter's Pit Bulls ~ Has emerged from his slumber to offer thoughts on the draft...

7. Neena ~ No one talk to her this morning.../pens fail

8. Ladi Izz ~ Our long lost friend returneth!

9. Sheena Beaston ~ Be sure to send her your submissions for "Best Song to Punch Someone in the Face To"

10. Steve Braband ~ Great minds think alike :)

11. Doug ~ CafePress is fired!

12. Tec ~ Here's to hoping the Madden curse is OVER...

13. Nate ~ Slick new Yahoo-esque avatar this week...

14. Noah ~ This week's 11th hour addition...

15. Grumpy ~ This picture will never get old...

16. Me ~ Nothing to see here...

I'd write something witty and/or clever here, but frankly, I've already wasted enough of your and my valuable time. Besides, you know how this works by now. Do it...

Click to enlarge...

Your comments go here...

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Meeting People Is Easy...

I was going to post this last night, but when there's a game on that's in six overtimes, you can't really be writing things on the internet. Sidebar: I'm a well known Syracuse hater, but I'm an even more well known UConn hater. So well done, you orange assholes. Good luck against West Virginia...Pitt fail blog.

Anyways, Friday is pretty awesome. I don't know about you all, but I'm pretty fired up that we've made it through another week without me writing about some Steeler being photographed with his dick out.

Some people on this week's panel wanted me to share some links with you. I've inserted those where applicable.

That's what she said.

Anyways, all rise for this week's honorable panel...Presiding this week are...

1. Dan Gigler
2. Tiny350z
3. Marc
4. Vern ~ Sick beret on this guy, though.
5. Steve
6. Jon
7. bigTC
8. Noah
9. Doug ~ Will make a Photoshop pro out of me if it kills him.
10. Ben ~ I actually love this song. Biz Markie for life!
11. John Woods
12. Neena
13. Grumpy
14. Keith
15. Nate
16. Matt ~ He's 100% right about this song. Awful.
17. Domski ~ Check it out, the FAIL Blog finally got him.
18. Some Douche ~ Frankly, I'm sick of this guy's shit. He will be getting banned from this site later.

As you can see, we have one new face on the panel this week. That'd be my man, Grumpy - proprietor of the blog, Grumpy Old Dog. You've probably seen me link to it a couple of times this week. If you haven't already, I'd strongly suggest you check it out. It's a real Solid (with a capital "S" apparently) read.

Anyways, I'm still more or less comatose, so why don't you just move right on to the grids. Yes, gridS. I'm incapable of excluding anyone, so in an attempt to contain the size of these beasts, I split the grid in two this week. I was feeling kind of crazy.

That's how I do's it.

And........go.

Click to enlarge...



I'm just gonna go inject myself with adrenaline now. Coffee is for pussies.

I'll be right back.

Talk amongst yourselves.

I'll give you a topic - If you were a hot dog, would you eat yourself? (see 0:42)

I know I would (if I wasn't a vegetarian, of course).

Meeting People Is Easy...

There comes a point in the evening/early morning after which no one can be expected to be funny. Last night, that point came shortly after 1 AM, when I was just about finished with all the dirty work, but hadn't added my answers to the MPIE grid yet.

Conversely, there is also a point in the morning before which no one can be expected to be funny. And today we still haven't reached that point yet.

Plus, all photoshop and no play makes Cotter wanna cut himself...

So I guess the net message = If it's mildly humorous, witty prose you want right now, might I suggest you start a blog and write some of your own.

'Cause I got nothing.

Anyways, here's this week's panel...

1. Dan Gigler
2. tiny350z
3. Marc
4. Vern
5. Don
6. Joey Porter's Pit Bulls
7. Notgomu
8. Sean
9. Noah
10. Ben
11. Doug
12. Tecmo
13. Nate
14. El Jefe

You know what to do...

Click to enlarge...

Now, where the hell is my coffee?

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Meeting People Is Easy...

Yes folks, it's back! After a short two week hiatus, it is my pleasure to bring y'all the official first offseason edition of Meeting People Is Easy!

It may not be Steelers related, but I'm kind of hoping that this thing'll help get us through the coming months of impending doom. Hopefully we'll even get some more new peeps involved, like we did this week.

Anyways, keepin' it real in this milestone MPIE are your panelists, including...

1. Neena ~ Big fan of CAKE.

2. John Woods ~ Thank you for the night terrors, J-Dub. Furries are no joke.

3. Tiny350z ~ Apparently has a friend in the Russian Federation...


4. big TC ~ This was a very solid performance for TC. I think he's made great strides since his first appearance in MPIE. I see a lot of promise in this up and comer.

5. Doug ~ I banished Doug to Canada last night because he doesn't like thin mint cookies. If you don't like thin mints, America has no place for you.

6. Keith ~ Pulling out the U2 so Nate doesn't have to. Teamwork at it's finest.

7. Shawn K ~ Wait, the experts don't know shit? You mean you don't agree that the Browns are going to the Super Bowl next year? Consider my mind blown.

8. Jon ~ My Twitter buddy and the smooth operator behind Doubledumbassonyou.com.

9. Noah ~ I'm not sure I would want to see Steely McBeam naked with a pitchfork. Unless by Steely McBeam you mean Megan Fox (semi-NSFW).

10. Nate ~ He asked me to answer question #4 for him. My answer? "Wannabe" - Spice Girls. It's probably true, too.

11. Steve ~ The man, the myth, the legend of the ESPN Sports Center Live commercials and proprietor of Steve Is Alive. Also needs to stop touching himself during Pens games.

12. Colin Farrel ~ Oh wait, no. That's just me and my dashing good looks.

And now that you know who you're dealing with, it's time that you enjoy our musings.

You know how this works.

Click to enlarge...

MPIE is a hell of a drug.

See y'all for this afternoon's twilight "welcome to the weekend" post.

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Where Are You Watching The Game On Sunday?

Phew, wow. What a week, indeed. As promised, here's the final installment of this feature on where y'all are watching the game. By and large I'd say most of you are either having or attending parties. So rock on. Drink lots of beers, stuff your face with all sorts of greasiness, maybe even make some bad decisions, and of course, hopefully watch the Steelers secure a second Super Bowl victory in four years!

Anyways, here's where the rest of these peeps are watching on Sunday...

Noah
Well, I can't say for sure where my family will be watching the game, but I can tell you one place that could be on our list. This is where we went for SB Xtra Large: Rookies Sports Bar and Grill, Lancaster, PA

COTTER NOTE: Noah sent me another email with an update...

It's been confirmed that we (my extended family) indeed are going to Rookies Sports Bar and Grill (located in Lancaster, PA) to watch the game. It's also confirmed that other members in said ext. family will be going to Tampa to tailgate.

Vern
Two potential spots. Well, three. But the third is unlikely. The third is the bar I usually watch the games at. I don't think I'm going there for this one.

Option one is, of course, to go to Tampa. It's a four hour drive, which isn't bad. And, you know, there's going to be a game there. But, there are issues. First, I have to work at some point on Monday, which pretty much means leaving within a few hours after the game. Second, there's no chance in hell that I would end up getting in, so it means I'm going four hours to watch a game in a bar. Which, as I wrote above, I don't really want to do. So I'm putting this at about a 20% chance of chancinating.

Option two is to watch it in the living room. We have a 65 inch TV and I haven't watched a single game on it this year, so that is an enticing offer. Plus, I don't have to go anywhere or worry about making a 4 hour drive after the game. And, I'm already planning on going into work late, so I could sleep in a bit. We'll have a gathering of sorts just like we did for last year's Super Bowl. So easy. Why is this not option 1???

Because I gotta go to Tampa, man. God damn it. We'll see.

The Starter Wife
Our plans keep changing. (Mostly because a friend of a friend works for the '49ers and we might get tickets from him. Although, I kind of hope we stay here.)

COTTER NOTE: I'm supremely jealous of TSW's connections. Domski and I know Mike Boni, Arizona Cardinals scout extraordinaire, who gets to go. But clearly we don't reap any compulsory benefits of that deal. Oh well, at least he's a good dude. King of Polo shirts. But a good dude. You should meet him sometime. Moon Township. One.

Notgomu
I'll be throwing a super bowl party at my apartment in Nutley, NJ. not too many people, maybe 10.  I figured it would be easier to stay in then go to a bar.  I don't want to be around band wagon cardinal fans or steeler detractors at a bar.  There will be terrible towels, but not too many steelers fans.  I think 2 real fans will be there besides me.  that kind of sucks.  But then again, I won't have anybody rooting against the steelers, and if I do I'll just kick them out.  Because you know, it's MY apartment.  I've got wings on the menu, a beer batter cheese dip, a BLT dip, lots of beer and shots. The mini kegerator will be in full effect.  did I mention beer?  Oh, and for the main course I plan on making Primanti sandwhiches.  I'll be using pastrami as my base. maybe some with capicola, or roast beef.  I just need to find a place for the bread. any suggestions?

And last be DEFINITELY NOT LEAST...

Scotty B
Three of my friends that I went to the Steelers-Giants game with this year are going to Tampa. Sadly, since I was just in Tampa for a week for the Iowa game, I can't afford it. I did think you would like to know that in our small Northwest Iowa town of 2,000, I know of at least seven Steelers parties this weekend, most of them expecting around 50 guests. Considering we're in the heart of Dutch Reformed country and it is church night, that says a lot about the dedication of Steelers fans around here. I tried to bring in some Iron City for our party, but wasn't able to find a distributor who could get it here. FAIL! Oh well, I guess a couple of kegs of Miller Lite will have to do.

And on a final note - I hope whatever y'all are doing, you have a blast! And everyone remember our friend Samantha, the victim of online role playing games, while you're partying it up. Cheers, you party animals!

PS - MPIE #2 should round out the day today. I hope to have it up by 4PM. I'm going to need a lot more coffee, though. Or some crystal meth. I'll venture outside and see what I can find. See y'all then!

Meeting People Is Easy...

12:45 AM. Gotta be up at 6. Had to do this in two parts due to overwhelming participation. This is installment #1. I'll have #2 for ya later on this afternoon. Will try to keep you abreast of any developments throughout day, but will be more or less off grid between 9 and 2.

New panelist this week is the inimitable Neena, who's kind of a big deal down in DC Steeler Nation. Welcome her with open arms, kids. We're Twitter friends. Gayness.

Words.

More words.

Take it away, Photoshop...

Click to enlarge...

What a week, man. Wow.

Meeting People Is Easy...

It's a good thing I really enjoy the finished product of this thing. Otherwise, I'd be liable to cut myself half way through all the Photoshop work. Or I could just cut the feature itself. But frankly, I'm just not going to do that. I'll just complain about it.

Newcomers this week...
Brett - the infamous Pittsburgher living behind enemy lines
Dave - the proprietor of 5 Golden Rings

Welcome them with open arms. Or just don't be assholes. Either way.

Click to Enlarge

I'm exhausted. Make your own jokes.

Meeting People Is Easy...

Here you go, assholes.

Click to enlarge

I hate you all.

Meeting People Is Easy...

Best thing about that Penn State-USC Rose Bowl yesterday? The Blue Band's Queen medley of Bohemian Rhapsody, Bicycle Race, and probably some other awesome tunes that I didn't get to hear because ABC went to commercial. Otherwise, I'll be forgetting the rest of that abomination by the end of the day. Screw you, Pac-10.

Anyways, welcome to 2009!

New Year, New Panel.

In no particular order, accompanied by audio of their "most played song" of 2008, they are...

1. Ladi Izz ~

2. Vern ~ Here you go...click on OMG

3. Sean ~

4. Shawn K ~

5. Lori ~ I cannot be relied upon to pick one of these. Choose your own adventure. Unless Lori has recommendations?

6. Doug ~

7. Noah ~ I don't wanna pick the wrong version here either. But you can check it out, here.

8. Don ~

9. Marc ~

10. The Immortal Silky Johnson ~
PS - had to go with a live version because Universal is super douchey and won't let me embed any of their artists' music. Weak. Also, Silky, your resolution is unrealistic. But I applaud the effort.

11. My Dad ~ YouTube has no answer for this one. I guess y'all will just have to download it to check it out...

12. Me ...
#1 =
#2 =
[I recommend not listening to #2 at work, or if you have any dangerous objects nearby, or around small children...and not because of the lyrics]

As always, click to enlarge...

And if you haven't perused OFTOT's Top Photoshops of 2008, I strongly urge you to check that shit out this morning.

I'm at work.

Send sedatives. Or Xanax. Either one works.

Meeting People Is Easy...

Attention, good people of the blogosphere - an egregious violation has been committed.

The window on Domski's car that has the Steelers decal was spray painted on yesterday evening.

Listen, violators of Domski's Hyundai Elantra, you will not get away with this. We will track you down and spray paint dicks on your face. In fact, we'll take turns outlining our own dicks on your face with spray paint. This aggression will not stand. This aggression will not stand, man.

And now that we've got that out of the way, let's meet our esteemed panel for this week...

1. Chimpanzee Rage ~ Dude, this is pretty badass shit. Good thing HE'S wearing a helmet.

2. Harvey Bars ~ I mean, I just don't...I...uh, wow...yeah...

3. Cecilio's Scribe ~ Yeah, my question is - like at what point do we just stop trusting ESPN for shit?

4. Mike Frazer ~ Failure to be part of the Offense, annnnd...failure to be part of the Offense, annnnd...smoking the reefer!

5. THE Jim ~ Jesus.

6. Sean ~ I'll put you in touch with Domski. He and I have a full lexicon of Spanish swear words. Thank you, Houlihan's Christiana.

7. Keith ~ If only this blog had such a button...

8. Noah ~ I fully appreciate his continued support of Killswitch Engage.

9. Christy ~ Still met Troy Polamalu and we did not.

10. Tecmo ~ In his words, "worlds collide."

11. Me ~ When will the reign of terror end?

As usual, click to enlarge...

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go watch highlights of Alan Faneca from last night and cry. Tissues, please.

Meeting People Is Easy...

Hmmm, I'm a little late this morning with MPIE. I had to cut it off last night at 1AM so as not to fall asleep amid typing with my laptop on my lap and my ass firmly entrenched on my couch. But better late than never, right? At least that's what she said (had enough of this yet?)

Anyways, I pretty much had the coolest experience of my life last night. And no, unfortunately I did not have a sexual encounter with Scarlet Johannsen or Megan Fox (not outside of my dreams, that is). But it was pretty damn cool nonetheless. I can't say anything about it right now, but that it involves this blog...That oughta make it abundantly clear for you...yeah.

Anyways, Friday. Meeting People Is Easy. After work beverage. A little Halloween action. All of these things are true of today. And given the amateurness of this post, hopefully the editorial content here at OFTOT will get better also.

As usual, I've assembled a crack team to tackle this week's toughest football questions...and that panel includes...

1. John Woods (NYT The Fifth Down) ~ He who worships at the altar of the sand knit Bubby Brister jersey...

2. Sean Leahy (Going Five Hole/Puck Daddy) ~ What a coincidence, I'll be wearing assless chaps for Halloween too...

3. The Sports Hernia (The Sports Hernia) ~ I'll be joining the crusade against this kind of douchebaggery...

4. Neal Coolong ~ Formerly of Die Hard Steel and On The Black Side, now the newest addition over at Behind The Steel Curtain...

5. Noah ~ His dog and Cotter's dog share some common breeding...

6. Shawn ~ This shall be his coming out party...in the sense that it's his first time on MPIE, of course...

7. LJKC ~ I said I would love to hear a full recap of her adventures with New Kids on the Block, and would you look at that, here it is...ish...

8. Matt ~ About five minutes quicker on the e-mail draw than LJKC...

9. Sheena Beaston ~ I believe you're familiar with this joker...no introduction necessary...

10. Domski ~ See Sheena Beaston...

11. Me ~ I don't know about you guys, but I'm going to be a full 10 hours of sleep for Halloween...

So here's the idiocy we came up with below. As usual, click to enlarge...


Catch you guys on the flipside...errr at Noon for the AFC North Headline of the day. Either way. I'm just gonna go fall asleep in the shower now. Should be a good time.

Comments welcome. Hell, feel free to answer this week's questions for yourself in the comments. The more the merrier...that's what she said. And on that note...