October 18, 2008

OFTOT Week In Review - Week 7...

Man, I am DOMINATING some mozzarella sticks right now. I can't even tell you how awesome they are. I f'ing love mozzarella sticks. I mean, they're just so good I can't even describe it. Like, whoever thought of frying up some oblong shaped pieces of mozzarella cheese is a god damned genius.

I'll bet it was Einstein, man. That dude knew his shit, let me tell you. The theory of relativity, dude? Brilliant. I mean, I can't tell you what it is or even what substantive area of the sciences it is derived from, but I can tell you it's absolutely, categorically brilliant. This is the type of mind we need to get working on our so-called "financial crisis."

And since we're talking about it...you know what? I've got an idea, man. How about we just crush that whole stock market thing? I mean, I'm not using it. Are you? Screw it. All it is is speculation. These idiots go research companies, project what said companies' financial results and profitability will be and throw money at whomever comes out highest in the black. What the eff do we need that for? How about we go back to making money the old way - private ownership.

But hey listen, what do I know? I'm a blogger. And a bad one, at that. So I certainly can't be trusted to solve any kind of financial boondoggle. I can't even solve my own. I'm currently worth negative money. I've got so much debt that I pretty much have no choice but to become really really ridiculously wealthy so I can hope to purchase a home before I'm 65. Oh well, I should probably worry about getting a girlfriend first, anyhow.

Now the real question is, how did I begin this post? Do you even remember? Yep, mozzarella sticks...to Einstein...to solving the financial snafu...to me someday becoming really really ridiculously wealthy. I can only hope my life will actually play out like this.

But that's the future. Right now, I'm a poorly paid, stressed out, sleep deprived, debt ridden worker/student who spends his "free time" typing on his blog and making little pregame tea party videos with his good friend on Saturday nights when he could be out meeting women. Such is my life.

Anyways, I wrote about some stuff this week. And that stuff included...

1. Rehdogg is the greatest of all time (watch out for the kiddies if you play this...Lori)...

2. Last weekend in the NFL was sickening...

3. Yep, still shitting on the rest of the division...EVERY. DAY.

4. Nine different ways to insult the Cincinnati Bungholes...

5. Tobiathan lamented the return of "Super Bowl" talk to Cleveland...god help us, indeed...

6. I'm like, so over the Wildcat Formation...

7. Chad Johnson is really batshit crazy...I have proof...

8. If you aren't a fan of OFTOT on Facebook, I strongly suggest you become one...and join the OFTOT network...hey, I like meeting people...

9. Imaginary conference call involving Roger Goodell, Mike Tomlin and Hines Ward...and hilarity failure ensued...

10. I never thought I'd ever say this, but thank god for Crain's New York Business...Tec and I will be visiting Zereoue's in the near future and will fully get an interview with Amos...mark my words...

11. We got to know some new fine young gentlemen...

12. Cincinnati. Tough game or cakewalk? You decide.

And that's it, kids. The week in a tight little 12 bullet package. I sincerely hope you've enjoyed it as much as I have.

Come back Sunday and we'll have a new [Unnamed] Steelers Pregame Show for you by Noon (hopefully), then Tobiathan's liveblog experience during the game. I give you my no money back guarantee that Sunday will be a good day at OFTOT. Hope to see you then!

TTYL
LOL
OMG

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO,

- Cotter

1 comment:

ladi izz said...

Mozzarella sticks are the TITS! For some reason whenever I get them, there's never enough marinara sauce.

Cheers!