Smartest Thing Cleveland's Done All Year...

Phil Savage to the unemployment line.

Yes, this is the thanks you get for drafting Brady Quinn.

It's not so bad, though. I hear the Bengals are looking to hire a GM. And, you know, they suck too. So you should feel right at home. Plus, Marvin Lewis has but one winning season in his coaching tenure and he has yet to be fired. So you'll have that going for you...which is nice.

And hey, if it makes you feel any better, it looks as though Romeo Crennel will be joining you shortly.

That said, anyone who tells you it was nobody's fault is wrong. It was yours.

Keep it real, Phil.

AFC North Headline Of The Day...

Ah yes, the Charlie Weis approach. Well played, Phil. If it works out for you as well as it worked out for him, you might actually have your job next year. Then again, Charlie Weis was completely apologetic about his team's ineptitude. How about you?

But, I don't really care about all that. In fact, I hope the Browns do bring back Savage. That just means a few more years of the Browns sucking, and who doesn't want that? Of course, they'd probably suck either way. After all, it is Cleveland. But I'll take established suckage over potential suckage every day of the week...and by the way, that's what she said.

Now, how about that whole e-mail scandal, Phil? What do you think about that mess?

Oh, yeah? So you're expecting people to forgive you for telling an angry fan to eff off because you've also sent countless emails that do not contain such an unsavory sentiment? Sorry dude, it doesn't work like that. But by making that comment in the first place, I'm guessing you already know that.

I doubt these links would save Savage's job, but go ahead and read them anyhow...

Were there ulterior motives for making Jordan Staal Assistant Captain of the Pens? [PSaMP]

WhatIfSports' prediction for Sunday? Cowboys - 21, Steelers - 17 [WhatIfSports.com]

Big Ben and Hines on The Plaxico Burress Show [KDKA]

Pac Man Jones' practice attire yesterday - shorts on top of blue pajama pants with Homer Simpson's face all over the legs and the phrase "I'm so smart." Indeed [Associated Press]

I agree, Sean. Talking on your cell phone while "on the toilet" is not cool. That's right up there with choosing the middle urinal when there's only three to pick from [Sean's Ramblings]

By the way, if anyone is interested in doing Meeting People Is Easy this week, here are the questions below. Just email my ass with your answers if you're on board - onefortheotherthumb@gmail.com...

1. Bigger Diva - Tony Romo or Jessica Simpson?
2. Beating the Patriots was ___________.
3. Charlie Weis, Romeo Crennel or Clay Aiken?
4. Favorite song to ROCK out to
5. Plaxico Burress?

Looking forward to your potential responses!

AFC North Headline Of The Day...

UPDATE: This shit is true! YES!!!! That's just awesome.

Ok, yes. Using a Deadspin post is kind of like having someone else do the work for you. But with a headline like this, how could I resist?

Frankly, if true, this is awesome.

First of all, why in the name of Al Gore would the General Manager of an NFL franchise post his e-mail address publicly on his team's website? I mean, that's just asking for trouble. Second of all, why in the name of Bernie Kosar would PHIL SAVAGE, GM of one of the most mediocre NFL franchises in recent history post his e-mail address publicly on the Browns website? I mean, dude, I see nothing good coming of that.

Now, you may be wondering, what did this fan allegedly say to Phil and what did Phil allegedly say in return? Well, I'll show you...



HA! That certainly was Savage of him (oh, the puns)...

Again, if this is true (which is doubtful, in my opinion) - Nice work, Phil. Like the Malibu Chief of Police, you're a real reactionary.

Hopefully I won't get any emails like that for posting these links...

Sid the kid - his excellence is not just limited to hockey [PSaMP]

Check me out failing on another site [Fan Foodie]

Chad Johnson DEACTIVATED for tonight's game...for fighting Marvin Lewis? Wow, I'll bet every Bengals fan in America wishes he had fought Mike Brown instead [PFT]

Brady Quinn apparently has a fractured index finger. But unlike Tony Homo, he's planning on playing through it (yes, daily peanut gallery, I know it was Romo's pinky, not index finger) [Cleveland.com]

Herpes is to York College's Wrestling Program as Staph Infections are to the Cleveland Browns (my words, not theirs). That's effing interesting, man [Deadspin]

I have no idea who this is, but I think I love her [This Is Getting Old]

A couple more notes for you...
1. There will be a liveblog tonight. However, I have class until 7:40. So I'll be rushing home, hopefully in time for kickoff. But if I'm a little delayed, don't fret (not that you would anyhow). Also, I'll likely be watching on the interwebs. So that should make things rather interesting...either way, show up and join the fun, around 8:15!

AND

2. I've still got a little room on this week's Meeting People Is Easy panel. So if you're interested, email me - onefortheotherthumb@gmail.com

/done

AFC North Headline Of The Day...

So you're incensed and offended by these "quitter" comments, are you Romeo? So you say you know you're not a quitter? Well I've got two other guys (see: Jamal Lewis and Joshua Cribbs) that say some of your team quit last Thursday. I mean, I'm no expert on the Browns, nor their internal affairs, but if you're going to defend yourself and your team, dismissing these accusations, you oughta at least offer a factual basis for your defense, right? Especially since your organization denied one report earlier this season that turned out to be true (see Kellen Winslow and the Technicolor Staph Infection).

Then again, like I said, who knows what goes on in that locker room? I sure don't. Maybe Jamal Lewis is just pissed off because Brady Quinn is stealing his thunder. Or his jock strap. Or just grabbing his ass a little too often and a little too affectionately. I don't know. I'm not exactly tuned in to the Browns dealings. I'm not privy to the new shit. So ok, maybe you're not quitters. Whatever. I'm just posting this shit because I found nothing better on these here interwebs for this afternoon.

Best part of the whole article, though -

"A displeased Crennel said he didn't think his players quit and any perception that they did was a poor reflection on him."

Well yeah, man. Anything negative about the team's performance can be a poor reflection on you.

But, you know, what the hell do I know? I just write the shit.

Oh yeah, and Phil Savage has got ol Romeo's back on this one. So he's got that going for him...which is nice.

Anyways, the Browns may or may not have quit, but these links just can't quit you...or is it you just can't quit these links? Now I'm confused...

Hamsters love the Steelers? Why not? Welcome to Steeler Nation, hamster brethren [PSaMP]

Big Ben - Nothing wrong with your arm, you say? [Trib]

Interesting Stat of the Day: Steelers have thrown on 3rd and 2, 11 out of 12 times [Trib]

Even more interesting - Bradshaw says Steelers - Giants in the Super Bowl. I think I love you, Terry [Fox Sports]

This is worth it just for the video of Brandon Jacobs getting murdered [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

Speaking of Brandon Jacobs, I can't wait to watch him run Ray Lewis over [NY Post]

Tiki Barber, we're no longer friends. Who doesn't love The Boss? [Sports Crackle Pop]

Sapp calls Sheshawn "a bitch"...truth hurts, man [Awful Announcing]

AFC North Headline Of The Day...

Well, wait a minute, Phil. Which person are we talking about? I mean, Romeo Crennell is a rather portly fellow.

Kidding aside, can't we all just agree that when the Browns are involved, everyone loses. There is no right and wrong party, here. This story needs to just go away.

Phil, you screwed up. Fine. Kellen, YOU screwed up. Whatever. Why don't you just kiss and make up? For Christ's sake...

At least you all and I can kiss and make up while reading these links...right?

Santonio cited for weed...awesome [PSAMP]

Sean and I tackle the big question - will Tennessee win the AFC [MVN Outsider]

Hines weighs in on "the hit" [Post-Gazette]

Yikes, McCain supporter mugged in the 'Burgh [TMZ]

Wyshynski interviews Director and Devils fan, Kevin Smith [Puck Daddy]

AFC North Headline Of The Day...

Well, you know what they say about loose lips - "they sink ships." Of course, I don't think the Browns have to worry about that much. Their ship sank a few weeks ago (if not quite a few years ago).

I kid, I kid...sort of.

See, the thing about this is - I'm not sure why Kellen Winslow feels it's so important that Phil Savage call him when he's in the hospital. Would Kellen Winslow have called Phil Savage if roles were reversed? Doubtful.

Sounds like the Browns got themselves a bona fide diva, ala Chad Ocho Cinco, T.O. and Plexiglass Burress.

Hey Kellen, guess what? YOU'RE ALWAYS HURT OR SICK! Here's a tip - PLAY A FULL 16 GAME SEASON AND THEN MAYBE PEOPLE WILL CARE MORE ABOUT YOU BEING SICK AND/OR HURT! Jesus, dude. It's your 5th year in the league and you've only made it through two of them without breaking a nail hurting yourself in one way or another. Two out of five ain't bad? Uh, no. That'd be two out of three. Two out of five is, in fact, bad. Get your shit together, you sloppy mess.

But you know what? As far as I'm concerned, he can absolutely keep making comments like this. It gives me something to write about on a Wednesday afternoon. So thank you, Kellen. Your contribution to today's headline of the day may have already outweighed your contribution to the Browns franchise over the duration of your young career.

Make YOUR contribution to the blogosphere and read these links...

Nate Washington, no longer like the candy bar? [Post-Gazette]

Yeah, I wonder if toddlers feel this way about the [Unnamed] Steelers Pregame Show [PSAMP]

Insult to injury? I don't know, I think this guy had it coming when he said the Steelers might become the LA Steelers (that was a joke in case I'm not being clear) [Sporting News]

"If you think Manuel has trouble with English, imagine him talking Japanese." Um, I believe the word you were looking for was "speaking." Imagine him SPEAKING Japanese. Who's a master of the English language now? [Associated Press]

Anyone else who remembers Mustard Plug can be my friend every day of the week [Sportsocracy]

The High School me is weeping in mourning [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

AFC North Headline of the Day...

Allow me to rephrase this one, if I may - "The Browns Secondary is F'd."

How's that decision to trade Leigh Bodden to Detroit lookin' now, Phil Savage? You better hope Shaun Rogers can generate enough of a rush to justify the hit your pass coverage took when you traded the second corner on your depth chart (not that he was that good to begin with...).

God, I can't f'ing wait for Sunday!

In other news...

Take a moment and reflect on 9/11. I still remember exactly where I was, what I was doing and my initial reaction on that solemn day [Joey Porter's Pit Bulls]

Coolong shines the spotlight on Shaun Rogers [On The Black Side]

This dude can come to my house anytime if he's gonna make beer magically appear [PSAMP]

Hey Lori, if Jordan Stahl came to my door, I'd want to answer it in lingerie too...saucy (just so we're clear, this is a joke) [Hockey, Football and Stiletto Shoes]

Mewelde Moore saw no evil, heard no evil on Vikings sexboat [Hugging Harold Reynolds]

Relive the magic with Tirico Suave [Tirico Suave]

Why The Browns Draft Success This Year Won't Really Matter...aka 2007 NFL Draft Retrospective Part IV

In short, it's Cleveland.

In all seriousness, and putting my obvious bias aside, Cleveland is like Arizona (though I have my reservations about continuing to doubt Arizona after Whis's draft crop...see above post). It's a black hole. They can draft all the top prospects they want, and they're still going to assume the basement position in the AFC North. I don't know what it is, call it the Paul Brown curse, but Cleveland has had chance after chance for top picks to come in and "save" the hapless franchise, and none have really panned out thus far.

Although, out of a journalistic responsibility to be moderately fair - Braylon Edwards and Kellen Winslow have actually produced some pretty good stats for the Browns the past couple years (when Winslow wasn't hurting himself riding his motorcycle...no comment for obvious reasons...).

Nothing like making the divisional rivalry interesting...and at least Quinn didn't end up in Baltimore! God, can you imagine the Ravens with Brady Quinn? I'd actually be somewhat scared.

So while I'm not that worried about the Browns good fortune - kudos to Phil Savage! You really nailed it by taking Joe Thomas first, then getting back in the mix just in time to get Quinn. I won't go into semantics, but this shows some draft smarts right here.

Oh, but if you guys think you're getting the Chin - forget it. If Cowher coaches in Cleveland, I'm gonna become a Patriots fan.