April 14, 2009

Hey, You Know Who Else Could Use $51 Million?


Ah yes, some light news for you today...

In case you haven't heard, the Steelers signed James Harrison, the man who you and I affectionately call, "Silverback," to a new six year, $51.75 million contract yesterday.

Justice served for a man who didn't even become an everyday starter until the age of 29, and yet two years later found himself a two-time Super Bowl champ, Defensive player of the year, and the current record holder for longest play in Super Bowl history.

And to think, the Ravens only gave that assbag Ray Lewis seven years at $44.5 mil.

Must cost an awful lot to have male cheerleaders, I guess...


Anyways, remember the time someone tried to get everyone to pitch in like $1 to pay for Silverback's new deal?

Well, 52 million is an assload (editor's note: I rounded up, in case that wasn't obvious). Maybe we better have a bake sale and a car wash too. Just a suggestion.

By the way, this bush league photoshop you see above is all I can offer you to go along with this post. If that's not okay with you, well, you know where the door is.

Rumor has it that when asked how he planned on spending his new found wealth, Silverback muttered something about buying several hundred buffalo and hunting them down one-by-one with his bare hands as part of his off season workout routine.

No idea what that even means. Or why I said it, for that matter.

Which brings me to the serious portion of today's post...

I joke a lot about drinking, beer bongs, and generally engaging in stupid and irresponsible behavior for someone in his late 20s. Because, let's face it, that's what I'm good at. But the fact is, for the next month or so, I'm staring down some serious shit with school.

So you'll have to forgive me in advance if I don't get to post something every day. Or even every other day, frankly.

I'll do what I can, but as much as it pains me to say, OFTOT is taking a back seat to law school.

On a separate, yet related note, if anyone sees my soul, please let it know that I miss it.

Thank you and enjoy your respective Tuesdays, my children.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo,

- C

PS - This post would've been a lot better, but I spent almost all night on a contract due Friday and once that was over with, I was too busy eating buffalo chicken flavored pretzels to really make it shine...oops, my bad.

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23 comments:

Get Fresh Designs said...

those buffalo wing flavored pretzels are great.

good luck with all that lawyer schooling.

random asshole said...

Take a lesson, kids. If you don't murder anyone, you could get an extra $7 million too!

Sheena Beaston said...

where does one procure such salty delights? i need them in my life.

tiny350Z said...

I would like to know where to find those as well.

And thank you for rounding up. That's how it's supposed to work with numbers. It was starting to bother me.

Noah said...

Law School over a blog? You mean you're more willing to get a good job and support yourself than make us post comments on the stuff that you write? Man, you're so selfish!

But alas, I guess I'll deal. Have fun.

Get Fresh Designs said...

here, order a case of these.

http://snydersofhanover.stores.yahoo.net/flavpretpiec.html

tecmo said...

Those pretzels are the best.

They're like 1000 times better than this blog.

Welcome back!

Cotter said...

doug ~ Those pretzels have brought new meaning to my life. Synder's should get some type of medal or something for those things. Un-real.

asshole ~ High five! Ray Lewis' life is a joke.

sheena ~ I mean, I got em at the A&P. But, you know, we have those in New Jersey...

tiny ~ Haha, wow. Who knew? I just figured it was closer to 52 than 51. Color me surprised. Only because talking to me about numbers is like trying to teach a dog to speak Chinese.

noah ~ And I hope to be able to maintain some level of consistency. But apparently law school is a lot of work. Go figure.

tec ~ 10,000 times better than just about every sports blog on the internets. I'll go on record as having said that. Write it down.

matt said...

Wow, I might have to buy a bag or 9of those.

I'm glad to see pretzels and law have taken a back seat to the blog, wtf mate?

Cotter said...

Clearly you've never had these pretzels...

Get Fresh Designs said...

i may have to pick up some of those for this weekend. it's been a while.

synders hit the nail on the head with that flavor.

tecmo said...

the jalapeno ones are badass. and i hate jalapenos normally

Cotter said...

I really like jalapenos and mushrooms on pizza. Don't judge me...

random asshole said...

Sheena: where does one procure such salty delights? i need them in my life.I'm severely disappointed in everyone here today. This was the perfect set-up for at least three vulgar jokes and no one even noticed.

Get Fresh Designs said...

buffalo wing pretzels > jalapeno pretzels

I like jalapenos, but they have to be fresh, those pickled ones don't do the trick.

Steve Braband said...

Dude, welcome back.

Secondly, I love how one of the biggest off season moves by the Steelers is overshadowed by Buffalo. Wing. Pretzels.

I love steeler fans.

Grumpy said...

Your priorities are screwed. The world needs this blog. Another lawyer? Not so much.

Cotter said...

Actually, that's the soundest argument I've heard yet! Minus the world needing this blog, of course...

Get Fresh Designs said...

steve, they re-signed him. what's to talk about? not like he stormed out of the negotiations and vowed to play for the ravens/browns/bungles!

you must not have had buffalo wing flavored pretzels yet. get on that.

matt said...

Does Key Food carry these pretzels?

I'm really mad I've never seen them.

domski43 said...

I hear pretzels go with beer??

Cotter said...

Just bought a bag of the Jalapeno Snyder's...so far survey says, WIN...

tiny350Z said...

I will look for these next time I go to the store... and will get beer to go along with them. I'm excited for this.

And yes, Cotter, welcome back - I didn't say that before. It's good to read a post from you.