November 24, 2008

Things I'm Already Over For $1000, Please...


Matt Cassel. Come on, be honest. You're over this guy too. I mean, Jesus Christ. You'd think he WAS Tom Brady. Oh, he just passed for 400 yards for the 2nd week in a row? Can he also turn water into wine?

Two 400 yard performances. That's real special. I'm real happy for him n'at. But I'm a bit physically ill already from hearing ESPN suck his dick like he's done some shit. Ugh. Jesus, guys. I'm choking! Could you please remove Matt Cassel's face from my throat?

Yeah, I know he's hot like summer in Saudi Arabia right now. But how long can that last?

Alright, all kidding aside. He's got Randy Moss, Wes Welker, Jabar Gaffney, Kevin Faulk, Benjamin Watson, and David Thomas around him. I mean, with Randy Moss and Wes Welker alone you're talking like 850 fantasy points. But those are all some pretty decent caliber receiving threats. So I could see how it might be easy to rack up 2600 yards and 13 TDs over 11 games. Especially when you have approximately zero running game.

But perhaps most astonishingly, do you guys realize that he's been sacked two more times than Big Ben!? Yes, two MORE times! So I guess early signs point to this potentially being a tough test. On September 8, I really didn't expect to be saying that at all.

What do y'all think? What do you make of Matt Cassel's pair of 400 yard campaigns? Do you think our #1 Defense will have a tough time with the Matt-Cassel-led Patriots? And who are you more sick of - Matt Cassel or Michael Phelps?

/I'm really just salty because I spent my weekend studying Leaseholds and related topics for an exam tonight...send Valium, please!

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's cemented into the brains of football analysts (esp ESPN) to praise the Patriots & ALL its players, and to call Belicheat a genius. No matter what.

I hope we kick the shit outta them.

Noah said...

Truth in what Matt said.

I think it will be a good game, I mean he is playing lights out football. I disagree w/ you Cotter on his receiving threats. When he started out, he looked worse than Maddox out there. Once he got comfortable though, he just elevated his game big time. I don't think some of those throws he made were easy throws at all.

Now our D is awesome so it will probably be all for naught anyway. Woodley and Silverback feast:

Steelers 24 Patriots 10

tecmo said...

My boy LB likened Cassel to other free-agent-to-be-QBs-who-were-supposed-to-be-franchise-QBs. Aaron Rodgers, career backup who got big money after a few wins. Schaub, backup who got big money to play elsewhere. Derek Anderson, who somehow got big money from the Browns.

My point is this. Cassel is in this same bracket. He's probably going to get a healthy payday after his recent success. Just like the three guys above (read LB's post for a better explanation).

We've yet to see Rodgers personally, but this year, our D got the better of both Schaub and Anderson. I'll never be one to take New England lightly, but I like our recent history against supposed big-armed guys like Cassel.

I'm also a homer, so take my words for what they're worth.

Anonymous said...

I'd like to see us crush them. Cassel has been getting sacked a ton, so Silverback and Harrison should scare the shit out him. I wish we had B-Mac back to help out with Moss.

I think part of the reason Cassel had such a nice day was the theatrics by Moss, he made some sensational catches.

Good luck on your exam tonight Cotter.

Anonymous said...

Silverback and Woodley, I suck at proofreading.

Also, my Woodley jersey is here today, I'm pretty pumped to wear it Sunday.

Cotter said...

matt ~ That and I hope we kick the shit outta Belichode himself!

noah ~ It's a little naive to think that having Randy Moss and Wes Welker to throw to doesn't help elevate his numbers. Slow start or not. Would he have the same stats if he was QB of the Raiders? Also, I don't believe I said anything about him not making hard throws. All I said was that he was producing. Perhaps by assumption, you thought that's what I meant. But really, I meant that it's a lot easier to put up big numbers when you're throwing the ball to some good ass receivers who have the ability to burn defenders, get open, make hard catches (or make catches in the first place, even - see Cleveland Browns), etc.

tec ~ I join in your homerism, in case it wasn't entirely obvious. I mean he's had success of late, but that doesn't mean that the #1 Defense in the league can't make him look like...well, as Noah said, Tommy Maddox!

marc ~ First and foremost, thanks my brotha! I am sweating big time (as per usual). As for this game, I think we might actually be getting McFadden back, but I'm not sure. And also DeShea. Which would pretty much be awesome. Either way, I can't wait to watch Silverback and The Wood have a field day (hopefully)!

domski43 said...

not so much worried about Cassel and the Patriots offense vs. the Steelers defense, more worried about the Steelers offense vs. the Patriots d.

jerod mayo is quietly blossoming into an excellent linebacker, and will probably win defensive rookie of the year. although the pats are without rodney harrison and adalius thomas, richard seymore and vincent wilfork will be a big test for the steelers offensive line. if ben throws passes similar to the ones he threw agains cincy, the patriots secondary will create turnovers.

time of possession and turnovers will be huge in this game.

domski43 said...

moss had a huge day yesterday because miami decided to play one-on-one coverage against him. Look for the steelers to make sure there is safety help over the top

/not Anthony Smith

Anonymous said...

I think that Ben will be the deciding factor in this game, the Pats secondary is horrid, their best defensive back is probably Merriweather at this point. Their linebackers are average, Bruschi is old and exploitable, Vrabel is hurt and old.

Hopefully Matt Light is suspended. We should and need to win this game. This should be a nice test for Tomlin, and hopefully Arians will not fuck it up for us.

Anonymous said...

sidenote:

Cris Collinsworth said Jets DT Kris Jenkins should win Defensive Player of the Year.

Dude is having a nice season, but c'mon!

domski43 said...

Cotter, is the picture of cassel w/ the star in the background inspired by "The Office" coffee mugs?

Matt - I've been hearing a lot about Jenkins and defensive MVP, but haven't watched the jets enough to have an opinion. But, I do have an opinion of Collinsworth (hes 100% d-bag). My defensive player of the year vote goes to Joey Porter. Leading the league in sacks on Miami where no one even gave them a shot is enough to get my vote.

Cotter said...

Haha, yeah. How'd you know?

/great minds, right?

Anonymous said...

At first I felt that if the Steelers beat NE next week, it wouldn't be as sweet because injured NE QB (I can't say his name; it's taboo) and Rodney HGHarrison were out for the season. Then I remembered that the hooded prick was still there, so my hatred went back up to 60%. Now after watching ESPN perform verbal fellatio on Matt Cassell all morning, it's crept up to 85%.

Anonymous said...

Domski - I'm happy for Peezy, but it's Silverback all the way imo.

Anonymous said...

I predict....

Steelers - 54
Cheatriots - 3