One For The Other Thumb: This Schedule Blows Goats

Let's see...14 days 'til training camp...we've covered pretty much everything...except...no, we covered that one...uh, well there's...no, that won't work, we don't have a Santa suit...uh...hey, look, it's Ben Roethlisberger!

/Cotter vanishes in a poof of dust like some crazy ass cartoon character

Just kidding.

Here's something we haven't talked about in a while - our schedule sucks. But this time, don't take my word for it. Here's what Mike Florio says...

Whether the Steelers, Browns, Bengals or Ravens can get to .500 comes back to those eight games against the AFC South and NFC East. A uniform failure by the AFC North's squads in those eight games could lead to the first 7-9 division winner in league history.

So if it comes down to the AFC South and NFC East, how will this really pan out?

That's the ~~Peytons~~ Colts, the ~~Jagoffs~~ Jaguars, the ~~Oilers~~ Titans, and the ~~Nobodys~~ Texans, as well as the ~~New Jerseyites~~ Giants, the ~~Cowgirls~~ Cowboys (yes I went with the obvious joke), the ~~Who's your Coach?~~ Redskins, and the Eagles (Eagles spared from wittiness due to my friendly allegiances). None of these teams were below .500 last year. In fact, they were a collective 82-46. Six of them were playoff teams. And oh yeah, I think one of them won the Super Bowl or something.

So, I guess we have our work cut out for us. But you know what? If we want to compete this year, we're going to have to play [most of] them eventually anyway. And listen, if anyone's going to beat any or all of them, I have to believe it'll be the Steelers, and not the Browns, Bengals or Ravens. Though, I guess you could say I'm a little bias.

I'll tell you who worries me in the division though, Baltimore. The Browns are catching more attention than a Britney Spears sighting at Spago, and the Bengals are just a god damned mess (still). But the Ravens, on the other hand, had one big problem last season - scoring. By all accounts, that situation may have rectified itself with the additions of Ray Rice and Joe Flacco(/Troy Smith). Couple that with the same nasty D? The Ravens always look like they're a tough team to beat..that is, except for that one time when Silverback pretty much beat them single handedly and Hines damn near knocked Ed Reed into the third row.

I guess what I'm saying is - if it really does come down to beating those eight teams, as Florio opines that it will, the one team to give us a run for the division will be the Ravens. Put my Anthony Smith hat on and call me "Prophet." Because that's how I see it, folks.

Anyone have thoughts on this? Are my thoughts on the schedule misplaced? Are you worried about the Browns or Bengals?

Oh, and as usual, here's a recap of what you missed this weekend while you were busy denying Facebook friend requests from people you never talked to in high school...