AFC North Headline Of The Day...

Oh, Mike Tomlin is picking the Ravens, is he?

I don't even know how this is a story.

Big effing deal.

Hell, I'll go you one better and say that the Bangles will win it.

Honestly, making predictions like that is the biggest joke. Just ask Anthony Smith.

I've said some of the most random shit in the past and sometimes I've been right, which naturally gives me some type of bragging right, and sometimes I've been wrong, which naturally gives everyone else the right to point and laugh (which, let's be honest, they're doing anyway).

Some people love doing this. They may not even make statements as predictions, but when they come true, they like to revel in the credit. I can't say I've never done it. But I can at least recognize how lame it is.

And isn't that really what life is about? Recognizing your own lameness?

Bottom line - Anyone can throw random guesses out there. But in the end, it's always a roll of the dice.

Let him pick the Ravens. The Steelers are defending Super Bowl champs. And besides, they just beat the Ravens THREE times in one season. Wasn't that an NFL first?

The Ravens, much as it pains me to say, are a good rival. Unlike some other members of the AFC North who haven't been pulling their weight recently. Their fans may be some of the most miserable specimens of human beings in recent history. But that doesn't mean they can't play football.

So maybe Tomlin will be right, but at this point, it's all speculation.

And if his 2008 pick is any indication, I wouldn't rely on Tomlin to predict the division champ...

That said, let me go back to something I mentioned this morning...

Conversation over.

I predict these links will entertain you for the better part of the afternoon...

The YouTube index of how bad the Pirates are [PSaMP]

Sean with FRANCO HARRIS!!!! [Sean's Ramblings]

A preview of the Super Bowl XLIII rings??? [WTAE]

Mike Tomlin aspires to improve. What, you thought he wanted to regress? Get real. Good story...not [Trib]

Darnell Stapleton and Willie Colon got PAID. Why? Because the Steelers don't want to hurt their feelings [Post-Gazette]

The Ravens are a bunch of vags...in other news, that abbreviation of "vaginas" doesn't really work [Grumpy Old Dog]

Creation Rex is ready to take on the Titans...hear him rawr [Creation Rex]

The Browns are having an open QB competition. Who gives a shit? Neither of them stand a chance against the Steelers anyhow [AP]

Dude who Stallworth hit wasn't in crosswalk...and Stallworth flashed his lights...and then hit him anyway [AP]

Orlando Pace visits the Ravens [Ravens Insider]

18 game season? Unnecessary. Let's address the real issue - preseason sucks. Sort THAT out, NFL [SI.com]

Wow, joke or not, maybe Rob Ryan actually SHOULD opt out of his contract [PFT]

Cooking with Geno. Just, WOW. And yes, THAT Geno (h/t Steve) [Pens TV]

Jose Tabata's wife? Jesus [The Big Lead]

Aw, how cute. NJ thinks it's constituents care about the Nets. I mean, I know NJ is pretty delusional, but this is pushing it [HHR]

Blink 182. Summer 2009. I'm beyond fired up about this [Morning Freakshow]

Groundhog Day was a hell of a film. Nothing to do with this link really, except that both involve Ned Ryerson [Carbolic Smoke Ball]

Anytime you use Venn Diagrams in a post, you'll receive a link from me [You Lay On The Ice Like A Broad!]

Post title says it all [Sportsocracy]

The picture? Jesus Christ. [9-to-fried]

Winter is a bitch [Dug E Fresh Rants]

Things you need to know about, courtesy of tiny350z - How to make your butt bigger. Although, you probably could do just as well asking random asshole about that [WikiHow]

I'm not sure they write better headlines than this [Moondog Sports]

Tuesday pot luck courtesy of Steve. Not sure how the Hot Shots picture fits in, but that just makes it all the funnier [Steve Is Alive]

FAIL Blog. Live it. Love it. Routinely makeout with it [FAIL Blog]

Some potential new tunes for your ears = White Arrows [Sheena Beaston]

Hey, would you look at that? Links like WHOA!

LOST is on tonight. Get your shit together. It's gonna be ridiculous.

See you on Twitterwebs (if you follow me, that is...which you probably should...or whatever...I'm going to grab a salad for lunch)...

Obligatory Footer - If you haven't already, become a fan of OFTOT on Facebook, join the blog network and follow me on Twitter. Or don't. Your choice, really.

Overheard On The Internets...

Well, without all the excitement and stress of Steelers season, I finally got to catch up on my light reading last night. I think my Google reader had upwards of 800 unread stories or some ridic business like that. So, at some point I'll get around to talking about free agency. Probably tomorrow. But for today, I'm just gonna post up some random notes of importance (or not), some Steelers-related, some not. Hope that's alright with y'all. Whatev, it's Monday. It'll be alright.

So I think we've finally pinpointed who's responsible for this Wintery economic climate. Bernie Madoff? Nope, this crazy bitch...

14 kids, you say? Single, you say? No job, you say? Jesus. The things people do to get on TV these days. Let me tell you something, sweetheart. I'm done with my schooling...err, at least I was before I went to law school, and I couldn't support 14 kids on the salary I was earning. Hell, I could barely support myself. I'm not even going to talk about this anymore. Trying to understand this ridiculous individual is like trying to understand why anyone would want to be a Browns fan.

The sad part is, I don't know which is worse, her, or this sloppy mess...

Scoliosis, my ass.

Deadspin got their hands on Tomlin's old William and Mary ID yesterday. It's too bad they didn't send it to me. I would've enjoyed that. Guess I've still got a ways to go. By the way, you can click that link if you want, but y'all know what Tomlin looks like. Just imagine him, oh, say 15 years ago and sporting a Kid 'n Play flat top. I'm sure this will prove extremely difficult. Not. Well, just in case, here, I'll make it easy for ya...


The LA Times wrote something about Big Ben. I'm not gonna lie, if this wasn't the LA Times, I wouldn't have even put it up here. I'm not like a subscriber or anything, I just can't remember the last time they wrote about football, let alone the Steelers, twice in a two week span. I guess that's what happens when you make it to and win the Super Bowl. The best thing you can get out of this fine piece of journalistic enterprise? Big Ben holds the record for throwing footballs through a hole at an arcade or something. How's that for game manager, all you haters? Oh, by the way, apparently Big Ben played the game with AT LEAST two rib fractures. Pro.

James Harrison loves animals, kids and old people. Does that mean he likes Ray Lewis, Joe Flacco, and Derrick Mason?

I'm not sure if this is congratulations or some kind of underhanded dig on the Steelers? Maybe if I was more awake right now, I'd have a better handle on it, but I'm not, and I don't.

I honestly can't believe that people are STILL commenting on the video of Michael Griffin talking about the Titans stomping on that Terrible Towel. The latest...

"we still stomped the squealers ass,enjoy your title cause it'll be a long while before yall get lucky again"

Yeah, because it took us a whole three years to get back last time. We better brace ourselves for a title drought, alright. I mean, not like most of this team is going to be around for a while. And it never ceases to amaze me how stupid it is to hear people call us the "Squealers." Get a new insult. That one sucks. The overall education level of these comments? I'd place it at about 3rd grade. Aren't the internets fun?

The Pro Bowl happened yesterday. I didn't really watch. I was too busy reading about entertainment law, unfortch. But I did see Kurt Warner say that Silverback "shouldn't have even been a factor" on that interception he threw (that resulted in the longest play in Super Bowl history)...to which I replied (out loud), "Silverback is a factor on every play, Kurt."

Get your head out of your ass. MVP, yeah. For me to poop on!

I also saw Troy knock a ball away from Redskins FB Mike Sellers. Troy's awesome...


And speaking of awesome...


Also, in case you missed them, the Grammy's were last night. Conspicuously absent was teen phenomenon, Chris Brown. Apparently, when he was supposed to be on stage singing, he was instead being questioned by police about smacking up Rihanna...

I'll bet he was just getting Punk'd. That Ashton Kutcher! What a joker!

Lastly, I don't imagine anyone wants to talk about that Pens game yesterday...

Steelers Won Super Bowl XLIII, Domski Disrobed...

I wish I was making that up. Had we all known Domski was planning on taking his shirt off when James Harrison recovered Kurt Warner's 3rd Quarter fumble, I think we all might have needed a bathroom break at the same time. But we didn't. And so, in victory, we all bore witness to his half-nakedness. Still not sure how I made it home safely yesterday, now that I'm partially blind.

What a game, huh? I mean, what can you possibly say that would do that win justice? I'm not sure they've invented the words you'd need yet. It was the best of times. It was the worst of times...

The Steelers led for somewhere in the neighborhood of 52 or 53 minutes, and yet, with two minutes and 30 seconds left, we found ourselves with two timeouts, the ball at our 22, and needing to go 78 yards if we wanted to win, a few less for a tie. Enter Santonio Holmes. Four catches, 67 yards, one really disappointing miss and one really awesome touchdown. I seriously thought he'd been pushed out. I thought, no way this guy got his feet in on that. It's cool that I don't know what the hell I'm talkin' about, because I'll be damned if he didn't!

But I think one of my favorite parts about that whole game was the amount of times I saw our guys in Kurt Warner's face, finishing their tackles (wink wink).

You might have forgotten, since we only officially registered The Wood's two sacks, but any chance the Steelers got, they were puttin' Kurt Warner's face in the turf...much to the delight of myself and everyone else watching at Casa Del Domski.

Anyways, you know how you know this was a big game? Because the Pensblog wrote about football.

So I should say - Congratulations, Steelers!!! Cigars all around...







I doubt highly that you need me to play parrot and repeat to you every glorious moment from that win on Sunday night. If it's a vanilla game recap you're looking for, you've come to the wrong place. But I will say this...


Youngest Head Coach to win a Super Bowl EVER.


Longest play in a Super Bowl EVER.


Most Super Bowl Championships of any NFL franchise EVER.


Six WRs have been Super Bowl MVP. Three of those six have been Steelers.


Woodley had 2 sacks and a strip, thus extending his streak to four consecutive playoff games with 2 or more sacks and also extending his streak of consecutive games being an animal to like...at least 19?


Silverback had four tackles, the INT, and the fumble recovery. Check out how fired up Ben was for Silverback's INT...

EXTREME!


Santonio the Great had 9 catches for 131 yds, and one supremely badass TD catch, en route to securing the game's MVP award.


Ben was 21/30 (that's 70%) for 256 yds, and was the other part of said supremely badass [game winning] TD. Oh, and on that play he made to Heath, you know which one I'm referring to - did you notice that the defender grabbed Ben's throwing arm, but he spun out and still made the throw?

They should've given out two MVP awards.


The O-Line only let up two sacks! Yay! Maybe we should let them go on that field trip to Sea World they've been bugging us about.


James Farrior had a hell of a game too. Seven tackles, six solo. Old man can still ball. Just ask Edgerrin James.


Timmons was all over the place. He may not have sacked Kurt Warner, but every down he rushed Warner, he came damn close. And in a hurry. Not to mention his closing speed out in coverage. Superman is a vag. TIMMONS is faster than a speeding bullet.

By the way...

Michael Phelps - 8 Gold Medals


Santonio Holmes - Super Bowl and arguably playoffs MVP

What do they have in common?

Thus proving that the real MVP on Sunday night was the Weed.

Santonio = MVP. Most Valuable Pothead. Dan Rooney looks shocked.

We know who the MVP was, but the real winner yesterday?

Mike Tomlin, who escaped the dreaded Gatorade bath. This, I just can't understand. I mean, isn't it like, a rite of passage to get drenched in yellow sugar water that looks like cow piss?

Oh right, and it wouldn't be a Super Bowl win without Hines Ward turning on the waterworks.

Hey, 2 catches, 43 yards. On a bum knee. I'll take it. Cry on, Hines. Cry on.

So what can you say about the Cardinals?

Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie...

There's only one word in the English language fit to describe what Santonio did to you on Sunday. Abused. Welcome to the league, rook.

I mean, yeah, I was pretty pissed off that we let them come back. Larry Fitz was his usual self. Uncoverable. I think they had Troy on him for most of the 1st half, which kept him pretty busy. But then in the 2nd half I guess they switched it up more and had Ike on him? Either way, the guy averaged 18 yds a catch and was responsible for almost 2/3 of the Cardinals 23 points. Ridic.

Also, let the record show that Kurt Warner threw for almost 400 yds, and all three of the Cards' TDs. And yet, they still lost. I suppose we could say that says good things about our performance. But not really.

How valuable were all those 4th Quarter comebacks this season? That "practice" paid off big time on Sunday.

By the way, don't let Cardinals fans confuse you, they lost the game from minute one on. They held the lead for all of literally two minutes. Albeit two crucial minutes. But outside of that, no.

The same goes for Cardinals fans pulling a "Holmgren." You wanna blame officiating because Kurt Warner threw a pick six from the 1 yd line, at the end of the 1st half, when you were getting the ball first in the 2nd half? Fine by me. You must understand, though, every team gets a few calls, and gets screwed on a few calls. The only thing that really matters is...

SCOREBOARD. Read it and weep, suckas.

Still, congratulations to the Cardinals themselves. Losing the Super Bowl sucks, but what a post-season they had. Ken Whisenhunt should feel pretty good about where that team's at now. Plus, I mean, any team who's got Mike Boni as a scout has only clear skies ahead. Very well dressed clear skies, in fact. Anyhow, congratulations, but not really.

For those of you wondering what my Mom thought...

This is infinitely better than when she called me a "bee-yatch" on Saturday. Thanks again for the encouragement in life, Mom.

And finally, I've officially launched my campaign to stop any and all merchandise employing this blog's namesake from being sold...

At least without giving me a nod. I have contacted the NFL via NFL.com and I expect them to give the matter the full respect it deserves.

At least print it out before you delete it.

SUPER BOWL CHAMPS!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! KL:NAKLNALKNGFSLKDNGNSDFKLSDGN LKSDFKLMS DLKF KSDF

I LOVE THE STEELERS!

...and so does Domski (who also loves Nicole)...

Big ups to Sheena Beaston for speedily providing the Whitney Houston jam. Clutch effort like Big Ben. I owe you a high five.

Rejoice with me?

You're A Good Man, Mike Tomlin...

TOMLIN NAMED COACH OF THE YEAR!

...Thus proving that a gangsta' can in fact dominate the NFL Coaching ranks. In only his 2nd year as Head Swinging Dick.

Congratulations, you crazy asshole. We love you!

Now go win the Super Bowl!

Vote for Pedro Tomlin!

Tomlin's up for 2008 Coach of the Year.

Whether or not you believe he's deserving (though I certainly do), I still urge you to go vote.

Come on, he'd do it for you.

And you would't want John Harbaugh to win, now, would you?

Quoth The Raven Steelers, Nevermore.

Let me tell you a story about the time the Steelers played the Baltimore Ravens for the AFC Championship. Better yet, let me tell you a story about the time the Steelers BEAT the Baltimore Ravens for the AFC Championship.

What a win!

Today, it's hugs all around...


Tighten that grip a little there, Ben.


Hope that hug didn't herniate a disc in Marvell Smith's back (disclaimer: that is a joke).


Bromance.


Man, that's like a Matrix style hug.


There are so many reasons why this is awesome.


These two put their tongues in each others mouths right after this.

I said it last night and I'm going to say it again this morning for good measure - you can't beat a team three times in a season, huh? HA! I guess nobody told Mike Tomlin and the Steelers that.

For the second Monday in a row, I find myself quite pleased. There were certainly less "highs" in last night's game than the San Diego game. But the only thing that matters is that Tomlin ultimately got the Gatorade bath.

We knew the Ravens were going to be a hard sell, but all in all, I'd say anytime you hold an opponent to under 200 yards of total offense, you can't really complain.

Plus, this makes two weeks in a row that Ben has made some pretty good plays. He was getting pretty good protection, and most importantly, he didn't make any major mistakes.

Oh, and guess what Joe Flacco fan club? Flacco - 13/30, 141 yards, 0 TDs and THREE INTERCEPTIONS!! Big Ben - 16/33, 255 yards, 1 TD, and NO INTERCEPTIONS!! You're a good man, Joe Flacco. This just wasn't your year. But hey, At least your unibrow got some good play.

PS - Fire your PR rep. And your genetics. That or resolve yourself to a lifetime of celibacy. Your choice.

Ed Reed?

Ish don't think so.

That said, I mean, the Ravens secondary was down to like guys who were working at Sizzler last week. So, does that matter? Who knows.

I'm not going to make light of it too much. But I will say that I hope Willis McGahee is alright. That was a hell of a clock cleaner, and he didn't look too hot. My thoughts and prayers go out to him.

Anyways, here are this weeks "Things That Were Awesome," "Things That Were Not Awesome," and "Things That Made Me Wish I Had Gone To Church"...

THINGS THAT WERE AWESOME
1. Our 1st offensive drive for 3


2. Stopping them on 4th down after Willie's Fumble


3. Deshea's pick


4. Ben to Santonio on the 1st play of the 2nd Quarter


5. Silverback's hit on McClain


6. Sweed's haymaker to Corey Ivy's jaw


7. Heaths play on 2nd and 24


8. Troy's pick six!


9. Anthony Madison = Special Teams Ace


10. Tomlin kept it real


THINGS THAT WERE NOT AWESOME
1. Willie fumbling


2. Hines hurt...though, he was cool to high five everyone afterward


3. Not spiking the ball quick enough at the end of first half


4. Longest. Game. Ever.

5. Joe Flacco's unibrow

THINGS THAT MADE ME WISH I HAD GONE TO CHURCH
1. Letting them hang around until late
2. Mitch Berger shank punt special
3. Special Teams run back that led to Ravens 1st TD
4. Letting them get 7 in the 4th quarter
5. Willie Colon - two false start penalties

Who gets canned first - Andy Reid or Donovan McNabb?

What an epic facial expression.

Get ready for Arizona, kids!

The Whis and Kurt Warner have already started their mobile make out session. This ought to be a fun two weeks.

We've got a whole new ballgame on our hands, now. I can't friggin' wait!

Only one thing left to do...


So, how awesome was that?