Why I Hate to Love New York...

As you all well know, The Big Apple is currently my home. Well, technically across the river in Hoboken, NJ. But it's essentially the same thing, and either way I'm surrounded by Giants fans. So I figured today it might be apropos to talk a little bit about this fair city, the one that never sleeps, since we're playing the aforementioned vaGiants on Sunday.

Some days, I love this place. It's a marvel of modern construction. You meet tons of interesting people with interesting backgrounds, and you can get a falafel at just about any hour.

But it's not without its drawbacks. And some days I just want to take this plastic fork that's sitting next to my desk and stab myself in the eye with it...among other such uncomfortable exercises.

So as a little psuedo-therapy, I laid out some of the positives and negatives about this small town below. Peruse them at your will and feel free to share any and all feelings you have on the subject(s).

Things I Love...
1. What time is it? 1:45AM? Ah man, it's early, let's go to the bar.
2. Chicks. They have them here too. Hot ones. They're not into me at all. But they're fun to look at.
3. Pizza. They make dough, sauce and cheese sing here.
4. Never having to drive anywhere. Ever.
5. Long Island. Thank you for producing some of the most ridiculous people on the face of the earth (including my Mom).
6. The Knitting Factory. This place reminds me of the TLA in Philly, one of my all time favorite venues at which to see a show.
7. Delivery everything. My ass never needs to leave my couch if I don't want it to.
8. Yo, was that a chick or a dude?
9. The Beer Garden in Astoria. Best outdoor drinking venue EVER.
10. My Friend: Dude, that was Gavin Rossdale! || Me: Big deal, Gavin Rossdale sucks. Where's Gisele at? (Sidebar: This actually happened)

Things I hate...
1. Trying to walk on the sidewalks around here is like playing Frogger.
2. 0.5 second hesitation at green light = permanent migraine brought on by incessant honking.
3. No, I do not want your inferior cable service, but I have no choice, do I?
4. Yeah, my new place is really sweet, man. I've got 600 square feet and I only pay $1600 a month! (Sidebar: this is not a true statement for me)
5. I think Hoboken could really use a Wawa. Like a block from my house. That'd be awesome, thanks.
6. Dude, walking six inches behind me is not going to get you there any faster!
7. The Yankees. But to be fair, I'd hate them no matter where I live.
8. Humidity. From May to October this place is like a god damn sauna.
9. $11 for a Tanqueray and Tonic? Hold on, let me go see if I can sell some blood.
10. Hipsters. You know, the ones that go out of their way to be indie. These people should be exiled to Staten Island.

Thoughts?