Lions and Tigers and Swine Flu...Oh My?

Two things to note today, neither of which are substantive about the Steelers. The good news is, there's really nothing substantive to say about the Steelers today. So this works out swimmingly.

First things first - I'm looking for 5-10 people to help me with a little project. All I can tell you is that it involves OFTOT and screwing around on the internets. Plus, you'll get to play around with highly confidential, proprietary, top secret stuff. No dinosaurs, though. So that sucks.

Also, as my net worth is approximately dog shit, all I can offer as compensation is my love and affection (not to mention you'll get to see some stuff that only few others have seen). Hopefully that won't discourage any of you giving souls from offering your services.

Anyways, if you are interested in helping a brother out, hit my inbox - onefortheotherthumb@gmail.com, or just leave a comment and let me know you're on board.

And now that we've got that out of the way, on to the REALLY important stuff.

As you all know, swine flu is an epidemic that's sweeping our great nation. When Bill Clinton (technically, George Bush, but whatev) signed NAFTA, I'll bet he never envisioned Mexico bringing us this. But hey, weird shit happens every day. And if it's going to ruin Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's honeymoon, shit, I'll take it every day of the week.

Still, by all reports, swine flu ain't nothing to mess with.

Luckily, I've been armed since birth with a weapon most people have not. Namely, Cathy. My Mom.

Now, I know many of you have been wondering - "Hmm, what can I do to avoid this nasty hog bug?" - Well, Cath has got you covered.

Read on...

Wow, did you guys know that a good immune system will fight off most illnesses?

And here you thought the answer was something mind blowing, didn't you? Nope, just common cleanliness. Shocking, isn't it?

Not as shocking as the fact that I'm cut from the same DNA as this woman, I'll bet.

By the way, if you're worried about my Mom getting pissed that I put her email on the internet, don't be. I'm pretty sure she learned long ago that anything she does is fair game. Also, I didn't use the f word once. So, I think she'll be ok.

Oh, and if you're looking for a swine flu mask with a little style, take a tip from this clown...

I wonder if he paid Rollie Fingers for the rights to use that faux 'stache?

Now watch these 1976 PSAs...

Betty's Mom is the outbreak monkey.

Signed,
Dr. Cotter

PS - Swine flu can suck it. And also, the Steelers signed Shaun McDonald (WR formerly of the Rams and Lions).

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