February 19, 2009

Perhaps You'd Prefer Something Lighter, Then...

Alright, well if steroids aren't your thing (and who could blame you with all this A-Rod gayness), maybe you'll appreciate the following conversation between Tecmo and I. This happened yesterday, late in the afternoon, when I was so tired I was actually seeing things. But all things considered, it's not really that much different than any other conversation that's transpired between the two of us.

So, sit back and relax. It's 4:15 right now. You're probably watching the clock like it's Scarlett Johansson's ass in jeans that are a size too small. And as fun as that may be, perhaps this will be just a little more fun. Besides, it'll only take like three to four minutes out of your life to read, if that...and very...very...very...very..very little brain power.

Go Eagles...

Tecmo: Velociraptor. That dude would tear shit up if he was let loose in NYC today.

Cotter: Good call. Yeah, the raptor might tear shit up, but have you ever seen that dudes arms? They're perpetually stuck in one of the gayest poses ever. I half expect him to be wearing a rainbow scarf. You know who's a real bad ass? Iguanodan. What the hell is it?

Tecmo: Um...is he hitchhiking? I only fear hitchhikers if they have a chainsaw, but I might be concerned about a 'saur on the side of the road with his thumb up. How about the mohawked Albertosaurus. His name is ALBERT!

Cotter: Come on, get serious. Albertosaurus? Someone named Albert just made that shit up so he could sound cool at his next AD&D meet-up. How about, what the hell is this?

Tecmo: Well, chafing would be out of the picture, but I'm sure some important parts could get crushed or broken. So did God create 'saurs? And if so, how did he get rid of 'em? I'd like to believe it went something like this.

Cotter: My guess? Something like this.

Tecmo: /wipes tear from eye...I wouldn't be too mad if God's fireballs spared those cute little dinos with the frilly neck thing in Jurassic Park. I'd totally hang out with those little badasses today. I'm sure we'd be good friends until they started spitting that acid bullshit.

Cotter: Oh, the spitters? Don’t get me started on those fascists. PS – you wanna cry? Watch this.

Dinosaurs, dude. Who doesn't love them? Obviously we do.

So now you know what kind of highly intellectual coversation goes on behind the scenes between us mental giants. Hopefully you're not dumber having read all this.

Tyrannosaurus > Every other Dinosaur


big TC said...

t-rexes are pretty bad but spinosaures would tear it up.


Noah said...

I voted for OFTOT!! And PSAMP!!!