AFC North Headline Of The Day...

The Detroit Lions and the Cincinnati Bengals should merge. Because maybe collectively, they can make the worlds hardest conscious effort to suck. Are you listening, Guinness Book people?

I mean, what? You want to KEEP Daunte Culpepper, presumably as your starting QB? WHY? I'm sure there are at least two or three sensible options out there that are not as old or as immobile. Maybe even four.

But you'd rather stick with Daunte Culpepper.

Well, what did I expect from a team that doesn't believe in playing Defense?

Headline number two today...


Oh yeah? That's interesting. Perhaps not, BUD, but instead of dicking around with blame, why don't you figure out how to move the game forward? You know, restore it to some semblance of prestige.

After this whole PED thing, a salary cap might not be a bad place to start. It won't do anything for the steroid problem, but it'll sure make me happy to see the Yankees and their fans cry like this fruitcup when they can't make the playoffs every season...



Yeah, no, you're right, MLB. Who needs parity?

What an unfortunate sitch.

I may not be able to clean up Selig's mess, but luckily these links are squeaky clean...

The Steelers should DEFINITELY draft Alex Mack! [PSaMP]

Some ridiculous and possibly OCD individual has created replicas of both PNC Park and Heinz Field, out of Legos. Holy patience, Batman. I'm way to ADD for that nonsense [PSaMP]

"In a Snuggie" = latest internet sensation. This is 100% legit one of the funniest things I've seen in the last year. Your move, Saturday Night Live [YouTube]

Santonio's gloves fetch $70,000 bones... [Post-Gazette]

"I’ve never sent an e-mail to a fan—ever...I don’t do that." See, Phil Savage. That's how the real deal Kevin Colbert does it. Not messin' around [Associated Press]

Here's a mock draft that has Alex Mack going to the Titans and the Steelers taking Max Unger, the allegedly 2nd ranked Center out of Oregon [Scout.com]

A good post-Super Bowl piece I missed in the Orlando Sun-Sentinel [Sun-Sentinel]

Someone in Dallas gets it. Big Ben is 50 times the QB Tony Romo is [Dallas Morning News]

Santonio talks to ESPN Radio about Jeff Reed and the Valentine's Day Towel Dispenser Massacre of 2009 [Sports Radio Interviews]

We've takled about this already, but the Steelers have a few free agent Offensive Lineman to consider re-signing. And they have 'til tomorrow to tag anyone [Post-Gazette]

Donnie Shell retires from the Panthers staff [Associated Press]

Former Nittany Lion, and subpar human being, Larry Johnson is now dating Chili from TLC [The Big Lead]

How can ANYONE think the Browns could be this year's Cardinals? [CBS Sportsline]

Broncos cutting Defensive players like they're going out of style. The good news is, they were gone before last season even started...I mean, I didn't see any Defense in Denver last year, did you? [Associated Press]

Igor Larinov's daughter is A. Hot, B. on Pens TV, C. The worst singer since William Hung [The Pensblog]

Oh, and here's a serious look at the Pens roadmap to the playoffs [The Pensblog]

Staal Tactics' take on that Pens game Monday [Staal Tactics]

Some Pirates gear for St. Patty's Day...as if any of you really care [MLB.com]

Wow, your last name is "Anus?" You must be the butt of a lot of jokes. Butt, get it? Awful [Blog of Hilarity]

Ten of the Weirdest Athlete Endorsements Ever [RootZoo]

Charles Barkley on a Golf Channel reality show? That's when you know things have really gotten out of control on TV [Moondog Sports]

Wow. That's about all I can say... [DailyWildcat.com]

Octuplet Mom's PR firm cans her ass...can someone explain to me why she had a PR firm in the 1st place? Ridic [CNN.com]

Facebook, dicking around with their legal mumbo jumbo. As I discussed with Tiny yesterday, it's a good thing they did, because they were headed for trouble with the way they handled their change in terms [CNN.com]

Theme of the day at The Riffs = Collaborations. We've already got what I consider some real solid contributions, so check 'em out. And do yourself a favor - follow The Riffs on Twitter. Anytime you need a reco on a good tune, Tweet at us! [Friday Morning Riffs]

PS - 99% of today's links were brought to you by Tiny350z. Tiny is kickin' ass in the "sending links to Cotter" department. Y'all better get your respective shit together.

Also, Marshawn Lynch is a serious individual...

Not messin' around. Is that a prison tattoo on his chest? Has he even been to prison?

Jesus.

And lastly...

I've got $10 that says Vern has something to do with this. By the way, if anyone can explain to me what an "H Cup" is or what that might look like, please do.

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