January 2, 2009

Ain't That Some...

Here's something I've yet to understand - there are people in Hoboken, enough of them to make it a trend, who scold you for throwing poop bags in their trash cans. You know, bags you pick up your dog's shit with, because the rule says you have to.

What? Like your garbage was full of various floral arrangements and combinations of air fresheners?

Dude, trash is trash, and all trash smells like shit. Am I wrong?

I highly doubt my dogs excrement is going to taint your precious trash can in any way. But, you know, if you can explain it to me in a way I can understand that doesn't involve you just wanting to be a dick, I'm all ears.

Otherwise, eat it (literally). And perhaps next time I'll just avoid your trash can altogether and put the bag of shit right on your doorstep. How do you like that?

Cool. Call me later.

Playoffs next Sunday, kids. Get your heads in the game.

And if you're not doing anything, feel free to check out OFTOT's "Top Photoshops" of 2008 and vote for your favorites in the comments.

7 comments:

random asshole said...

Hmm. There are assholes in Hoboken? I never, ever would have guessed; thanks for the highly valuable insight.

Cotter said...

Shocking, I know.

For what it's worth, the same goes for most of NJ.

But then, I'll bet you already knew that!

Marc said...

Are these private garbage cans or public ones? Either way it's better than on the street or on their steps.

My aunt told me that in Chicago near her house people will watch for people that don't clean up dog shit then pick it up and put it in the offenders mail box.

Marc said...

Are these private garbage cans or public ones? Either way it's better than on the street or on their steps.

My aunt told me that in Chicago near her house people will watch for people that don't clean up dog shit then pick it up and put it in the offenders mail box.

Cotter said...

Private. And if they were smart enough, they'd probably do the same. But this is NJ we're talking about. So, lowered expectations...nahmeen?

Notgomu said...

I have a similar story. I was walking the dog and brought a bag, but I was halfway though with the walk, when she dropped her present for me. and I really didn't feel like walking ALL THE WAY home with this bag of crap. Unfortunately for me, it wasn't garbage day on the block I was traveling down. So, I walked up the driveway of the only house without a car in it, and proceeded to open their can and deposit my bag. This of course would be the perfect time for them to pull in the driveway, you know their trash can lid in MY hand. I don't know if i was more embarassed or annoyed by it. Now I'm pondering what to do next? Do I nonchalantly walk past the car as its driving up? or, run like hell and get out of the area as fast as possible. I chose the former, and walked by them like nothing was wrong. I should've just run. This couple proceeds to jump out of the car and berate me for trespassing(which i kind of understand) and casing the joint for a future possible break in!??! Yeah, because that's what I do. I bring my 12 lb. shih-tzu with me when I'm "casing" a joint. I tried to explain that I was just innocently disposing of my dog's excrement, but they wouldn't have it. The woman told me to stay put, she was calling the police, and the man stayed behind to watch me. So, now I moved to option 2 (which is what I should have done from the beginning mind you), and picked up my dog and ran like hell and got out of there as fast as possible. I HATE people.
***NOTE*** I have never walked the dog on that route again.

marc said...

I would have just told the guy, I was dropping dog shit off, I'm leaving, have a good day sir. I would have walked away. He wouldn't have fought you, and the cops would likely have told the couple "yea, we'll find him" (eye rolls, jerking off motion)