Well, That Was One Labor, Dabor...

OK. So we've got a lot to talk about today then, huh? Nice little three day weekend there. I think more happened in the last three days than pretty much the entire last month.

Let's recap...

#1 - We won our final preseason game
Only one thing really to say here - no one got hurt. 3-1 overall, I'll take it. And for those of you who may have forgotten, Jeff Reed is still partyboy solid gold.

#2 - Batch is officially on IR
It pains me greatly to say it, but this was the right move. I don't really like Lord Byron that much. But he is, as Batch was when he signed in '02, a former starter that we know can play the position relatively well. He's no Big Ben. But of course, only one man is. And in case you're in the mood for a little YouTube video-age, bear witness to my advice for Leftwich below...


#3 - The final roster was announced along with practice squad
Yes, we now know the answers to this preseaon's burning questions - Baker is the 5th wideout, Berger is the punter (today), Hartwig is our starting Center, and we obviously learned our lesson from the Allen Rossum Experiment (see: Eddie Drummond cut). Done and done. Among the cuts that I was disappointed to see - none.

#4 - ESPN > Fox Sports
In case you missed it, ESPN officially anointed Steeler nation the best fanbase in the NFL. Some of you may remember Fox Sports recently bestowing the same honor upon Eagles fans. Which, of course, means the writers at ESPN are clearly way more sane than the writers at Fox Sports. And lest we forget, in our shock and anger over Fox Sports' poor judgment, we are still Commonwealth brethren. I think we can all (both PA fanbases, that is) agree on one thing - both Ohio and New Jersey suck.

#5 - OFTOT fantasy league autodraft went off without a hitch
Some of you may be aware, some of you may not. But Domski graciously set up a fantasy league for some of OFTOT's usual suspects. Of course, it's public. So somehow we got a Pats fan in there. But that'll just make it all the more sweet when we all dump on the guy later. Anyways, we set it up to just autodraft, because, why not. Coordinating a draft is almost as fun as being Brady Quinn. So we decided to skip the pleasantries and get right to the point. Only thing to note here is - somehow, Notgomu ended up with half of the Steelers Offense - including - Big Ben, Willie Parker, Rashard Mendenhall, Santonio Holmes and Heath Miller. I think all he needs for the cycle is Hines Ward.

#6 - Neal Coolong is back online
You may remember Neal from his stint last season at Die Hard Steel. Well, unbeknownst to him, his site was rudely yanked from the interwebs by the admin without but an email letting him know he should secure any outstanding content. Nevertheless, our hero trudged on in the face of adversity and set up his new blog home at, On The Black Side. The name is a play on the fact that the Steelers helmet has only one logo. So I'd like to officially welcome Neal back to the Steelers blogdome and I strongly encourage all ye who crave Steelers analysis for the next 17 weeks (and hopefully more) to check OTBS out. Now if we could just get Neal up on skates...

And I think that about covers it...did I miss anything? What do you guys think of the final 53-man roster? Thoughts on Leftwich vs. Batch? How about Steelers Nation being #1 on ESPN? Oh, and did you guys hear that the Bengals cut Rudi Johnson and Willie Anderson? I think it's official - they are no longer even trying.

PS - After horsing around with the camera during our recent game against Minny, Tecmo and I have decided to try our hand at a little weekly pregame show. So over the coming season (hopefully), you will see and hear much more of our asinine commentary on everything Steelers...in living color. We're still working on a clever title for it. But in the meantime, feel free to preview some of the type of nonsense you can expect via the following clips...

On This Season's Schedule


On Questionable Playcalling


On Not Knowing What Was Going on At The End of the Game


On Mendenhall's 4th Quarter Fumble


On Mendenhall's Fumbling Problem


On Dennis Dixon


On...Something


On Shartlesville, PA


On Tony Homo Romo


On Jerseys That May/May Not Exist

Heeey Michael, Whaaat's Happe-ning?

Cut day. I wouldn't know anything about it since I've never played football nor have I ever been cut from any type of organized sports team (unless Extreme Shuffleboard counts). But I often wonder what it must be like when a guy gets cut in preseason. Does Tomlin take him out to Eat 'n' Park breakfast? A French Toast Smile to soften the blow, perhaps? Or is it more like Hoss's for a nice Surf 'n Turf dinner? Or maybe just Sheetz for some tapas?

Like I said, I don't know.

Still, that doesn't mean I can't use my active imagination and explore this a little bit. So for the sake of keeping things remotely entertaining around here, and humoring my odd curiosity, I've jotted down what I would like to think is how a typical cut might go. Below, you'll find the completely fictional and totally lacking in substantive value, exchange between recently departed Mikey Potts and Head BA in Charge, Mike Tomlin. I hope you enjoy.

Here' goes...

Tomlin: Michael, come in. Sit down. Let's chat. You want a Mint Double Stuff'd Oreo? I can't get enough of these things. It's like they took a slice of heaven and put it smack dab between two pieces of devilishly delicious chocolate-y crackers.

Potts: Uh, sure Coach. But umm, is that what you wanted to talk about?

Tomlin: Well, no. Not exactly. See Michael, sometimes there comes a time when people must part ways. Unfortunately for you and I, today is that day. Son, you've been cut.

Potts: But Coach Tomlin, I...

Tomlin: Now Michael, the important thing is that you act like we treat you around here. Like a man. And men don't cry. You hear that, son? Don't you cry on my couch, that's Corinthian leather imported from Newark, New Jersey!

Potts: Sorry Coach, I couldn't help myself. I mean, how could this happen? We went to the same Alma Mater? I thought I was really getting the hang of this NFL thing?

Tomlin: Michael, the reality of it is - sometimes you eat the bar and sometimes the bar eats you. Today, you need to take the next step. Which is, right out the door. Because we're at 80 and we need to be at 75 by tomorrow at 4 PM. I'm sorry son, it just isn't meant to be.

Potts: Well, can I ask a question then?

Tomlin: Sure, lay it on me Martavarius.

Potts: Sir, I'm...nevermind. Listen, what do you think I need to do to elevate my game to NFL level?

Tomlin: Damn these Primanti's sandwiches are ri-dic-u-lous! Have you had one of these? Un-friggin'-believable. A whole year and a half and I could still eat these everyday. Man, how do I get this whole thing into my gullet without tearing an ACL? Wait...what was the question again?

Potts: Uh, what do I need to do to catch on with an NFL team?

Tomlin: Oh right you are, young man.

Potts: Yeah, it was my question.

Tomlin: HEY! Did I say you could talk? Hold up! You wanna know what you need to do to make an NFL squad? Find Dr. James Andrews, Peyton Manning, Vince Young and Tom Brady, and convince the good doctor to learn plastic surgery. 'Cause you'd need Manning's arm, Young's legs and Brady's sex appeal. That or if you just wanna hang around and hold a clip board on the sidelines, you could probably just mug Brady Quinn and throw his jersey on.

Potts: That's fabulous. Real great advice. You know what? I'm happy I'm outta here. You know who needs a QB? Ken Whisenhunt. Mark my words, I will be an Arizona Cardinal soon. I'm calling scout extraordinaire Mike Boni now. Hey, at least I wouldn't throw three picks in a preseason game.

Tomlin: You got a point there, Jeremy.

Potts: Mike.

Tomlin: Who you callin', Mike? You can call me "Sir," "Coach," "Mr. T," or "Tinkerbell." But I know you ain't callin' me, Mike?

Potts: No Coach, my name's Mike.

Tomlin: Oh no it's not. Not anymore. I'm the only Mike in this room. Right now, at least. I'm callin' you, Joey. And Joey, I'd like to show you the door. Because you're friggin' cut! Now clear out before I have to go Bill Cowher on your ass. And let me warn you now, my saliva glands have been working overtime lately!

Potts: Whatever man, this is some BS. Have fun with Orpheus Roye, jagoff.

Tomlin: Wait, Omar Jacobs. You really wanna know why?

Potts: Omar Jacobs? I mean...uh...sure, I'll bite.

Tomlin: We're putting cover sheets on all our TPS reports now. Didn't you get that memo? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Potts: Alright, I'm outta here.

Tomlin: [inner narrative] Hmmm...I wonder what it would taste like if I put the Oreo on the sandwich...Oh man, that's the stuff. Hey, wait a minute, where's my IC Light? ... ... Hey yo Tommy Maddox, get back here!

[Fade Out - Hit play below for accompanying soundtrack selection]


Wow, was that some severe idiocy or what? Comments? Questions? Emotions? I'll wait 'til you're all done jamming to that sick tune...

And in other news today that might actually make you smarter, rather than dumber, Tec interviewed Bob Smizik. Yep, you read that correctly. The foreshadowed interviewee was none other than the man, the myth, the legend himself.

It's a really good read. And while I think there were a few semi-tense moments, each side was very open to what the other had to say. See, we all really can get along.

Of course, that probably wouldn't have been a problem for me, considering Smizik and friends probably don't even know I exist. HA! Under the radar...equip stealth armor...cloak Toyota Camry...

[EDITOR'S NOTE/UPDATE -- I refuse to devote an entire post to this, but the team just made what should be it's final cut of the week - Tight End, Cody Boyd. I can see you're all really broken up about it. I'll let you mourn in peace...]

So Long Mikey Potts, We Barely Knew You...

It is with a heavy heart that I deliver this sad news to all you ravenous Steelers faithful - OFTOT fav, QB Mikey Potts has just been cut. We knew this day would come. We just thought we would have gotten more time with him. Mikey P, good luck in Arizona. No doubt you'll be on a plane, headed there shortly. That's probably Whisenhunt on the horn now. Better let you go...

In other cuts/roster moves...

Jeremy Bloom - OUT!
Martavarius Prince - OUT!
Robopunter - OUT! (On IR, that is)

...And there will be one more lost before tomorrow's out (when the Steelers need to be down to 75).

But never you fear, Eddie Drummond's still here...

REFERENCE MATERIAL:
Steelers Cut Bloom, Put Sepulveda on IR [Trib]
The Legend of Mikey Potts [OFTOT]